The Kharisma Series SHOUD 7
Presented to the Crimson Circle Mar 7, 2015
Original Website http://www.crimsoncircle.com/
Welcome, dear friends. Welcome, welcome. Thank you for the beautiful music (played by Gerhard & Einat). Ah! Let's take a deep breath, as we get started.
What a group here. What a group there (online). Ah! Let's bring it all together, all of you out there bringing it together with all of you here, and I'd like to open with a Shaumbra riddle. Hm. Yes, this is an easy one. Shaumbra riddle.
But before the Shaumbra riddle, I have to ask probably a more pertinent question. Sandra, where is my coffee? (laughter) Ahhh! (she hands it to him) As if almost on cue, and what a divine cup I'm being served in today. No more of these plastic cups. No more of these paper cups, but true elegance for a true Master.
LINDA: So it should be. (audience agrees)
ADAMUS: Yes. Yes. And as I heard said today, this is not Louisville Colorado. (Adamus mocks Geoff's pronunciation) Louie-ville. (French pronunciation) Lou-ville. Lou-ville. 'Lou,' like the kings, ahh, and 'ville' like the homes. Yes, yes. How fitting that we are here in Louie-ville. Yes. Not Louisville. (laughter)
So a toast to each and every one of you (raising his coffee cup), ah yes, watching in, sitting here in person.
And what have we here? (looking at Linda who is dressed as a Vulcan in honor of Leonard Nimoy's recent passing)
LINDA: Nothing special.
ADAMUS: Spock. Spock. Ah. Spock. Yes. (rubbing her shoulders) Ah! I have to take a moment here, Spock. Relax Spock. Yes.
LINDA: That's not logical. (laughter)
ADAMUS: Relax. So I hear tell that the one who played, the one who acted as Spock recently crossed over. And what do you think the essence of Spock experienced when this being crossed over? This being who had played the role of the being who got so caught up into the mind? What do you think Spock suddenly realized?
LINDA: He was God also.
ADAMUS: Hardly. (laughter) Hardly, hardly, hardly.
So when Spock, which is now part of consciousness … oh, there is a being called Spock in the other realms. Not just the one who played Spock, this dear Leonard, but there is a Spock in the other realms now.
And when Spock crossed over, it didn't make sense. It wasn't logical – this whole experience with crossing over, the whole experience with death. No, made no sense at all, and it threw the consciousness of dear Spock into a bit of a turmoil. Kind of thrown inside out, upside down. Didn't make sense. And as much as Spock tried to make logic of this thing of crossing over, it simply didn't.
And as much as Spock tried to resist and tried to make sense and logic of it, and tried to scorn this as being just a human experience of needless death, something did happen to Spock, portrayed by, of course, the actor. But something did happen. Spock realized that there is more than logic; much, much more than things that make sense.
And particularly Spock realized that Earth is by far the grandest of all planets anywhere. (some laughter)
LINDA: Of course.
ADAMUS: And for all of his condescendence about Earth and the human journeys, things, which, of course, he never truly understood, and for all his looking down at the humans, he suddenly realized that it will never make sense.
LINDA: He didn't look down, he just didn't understand!!
ADAMUS: Same difference. (Adamus chuckles) He suddenly realized that ultimately there is no real logic in the universe. There also is no truth in the universe. He suddenly realized that there was something far, far grander, and that is the sensual experience of life.
ADAMUS: Something that can be experienced only on Earth to its fullest, only on Earth.
And so what is Spock, the consciousness, doing right now?
ADAMUS: (chuckling) Planning to incarnate, yes, the consciousness of Spock – not the actor, but the consciousness of Spock – to take physical form, to take the mind. But more than anything, to take the heart and the passion that cannot be found on even the most intelligent of planets, because ultimately intelligence means nothing without the heart.
So Spock, we welcome you to our gathering, and perhaps today you will learn something about human trials and tribulations, about human tragedies and comedies. Perhaps you'll learn something about the whole human experience that will eventually, my dear logical one, bring you to true enlightenment. (Adamus takes a sip of his coffee) Ahh!
LINDA: I'm holding my breath.
ADAMUS: And coffee. And coffee. Yes.
So the riddle is, Shaumbra, the riddle is: What is here and what is missing?
ADAMUS: What is here but also at the same time missing? It shouldn't take you that long to figure out. Dear Spock, Linda, whatever, if you would, microphone please. We have several questions. What is here and missing? Very simple.
SHAUMBRA 1 (woman): Realization.
ADAMUS: Realization. Sure. Good. What's here and missing? Don't give that to here. She didn't want it. (Adamus chuckles) What is here and missing at the same time?
SHAUMBRA 2 (man): Consciousness.
ADAMUS: Consciousness. Yeah. It's pretty obvious. We don't have to belabor this question at this point …
LINDA: Oh good.
ADAMUS: … but it's a great Shaumbra riddle. It's what's here and missing at the same time – feeling, passion, consciousness, I Am-ness, I Exist-ness. It's here but it's also missing. We're going to get into that today and help give you a little bit better understanding of how it can be here and missing at the same time.
So let's take a good deep breath, as we get into this day and our Shoud question of the day.
Here we are slightly over two months into this new year. Interesting year it will be; a year of a lot of different events – yeah, you don't have to be a Master to realize that – but a lot of chaos, a lot of commotion. It'll be tiring for most humans, very, very tiring, so many things changing on this planet. And just when you thought, “How could anything change more?” it's going to change more. Absolutely.
So the question is …
SART: All aboard!
ADAMUS: Yeah. Time to get excited.
The question is in these past two months and a week of time, what have your inner experiences been like? I want you to be aware. I want you to take a moment – your inner experiences.
Now, I don't want stories. I don't want any of that “I don't know.” (Adamus whispers) None of that. Ten words or less. And if you say, “Well, let's see, my inner experiences have been,” you just used up most of your words. (some laughter) So cut to the chase, as they say.
And the reason why I want to do this, because I want everyone here, whether you're sitting here in Louisville, whether you're watching in online, I want you to realize the similarities in what your experiences have been, because there is a tendency to feel that you're alone, a tendency to feel that you're the only one going through these things.
You're going through your own personal experiences, deep experiences, but there's also kindred spirits going through this with you.
So, Linda, if you would, please, with the microphone, especially to the new ones. Yeah, break them in.
LINDA: Oh, new ones?
ADAMUS: Break them in.
LINDA: Uhh-oh. (some giggles)
ADAMUS: Summarize your inner experiences since the first of the year.
SHAUMBRA 3 (man): Really personal and that I already know.
ADAMUS: Well, personal experiences would be personal.
SHAUMBRA 3: That I already know.
SHAUMBRA 3: That I already know. I feel like what I want to know is really fleeting. It comes in and then I want it to be something else, but when I get at the end of the day, I knew it. Like I already know. So…
ADAMUS: Good, good.
SHAUMBRA 3: I don't why I want it to be a different answer, but…
ADAMUS: Sure. And part of the reason for that is because you, others, are starting to go timeless. And as you go timeless, it's a strange mixture of past and present, kind of past and future passing each other, sometimes briefly stopping and briefly kind of making sense or at least feeling settled in. But it's going to continue, that knowing/not knowing feeling. Can you be comfortable with that?
SHAUMBRA 3: Yeah, I can.
ADAMUS: Good, good. You don't have a choice really. (laughter)
LINDA: Good answer.
ADAMUS: It is what it is. Yes. Good. Thank you. Thank you.
LINDA: And you're not new, but you are. (next Shaumbra sighs)
LINDA: You had to see it coming.
ADAMUS: You were going to get that microphone …
ADAMUS: … no matter what.
ADAMUS: I tried to protect you.
TERESA: I know. Thank you.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Since the first of the year, inner experiences.
TERESA: Crazy, chaotic emotional, overwhelming and then beautiful, insane the gifts they've provided.
ADAMUS: Okay, good. Will you make me one commitment to yourself?
ADAMUS: No more lessons. You don't need all that craziness.
TERESA: I know! Right?
ADAMUS: Yeah, right!
TERESA: I told, I … yes! Yes! I will. I will. (Adamus chuckles) Yes.
ADAMUS: You don't need to have that craziness, and then especially do not try to make sense out of the craziness. Spock did that. But do not try to make sense out of it. That's old. That's kind of 'awakening,' even 'pre-awakening.' That's kind of bordering on makyo. You try to say, “Well, here's what I was supposed to learn from that.” (Spit!) Like that. (laughter) No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Because you're going to get yourself into a pattern of more and more “Well, I need more lessons,” and you don't.
Here's what's happening …
ADAMUS: … just as with the gentleman before you. The past and the future are going sideways now, and they're meeting each other. They're dancing with each other, they're spitting on each other, they're playing on each other, and it won't make sense, Spock. It won't make sense.
LINDA: That was in the mid-60s! (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: I don't see you exactly dressed for the 2015 right now.
LINDA: This doesn't look 2015?!
ADAMUS: You just said it was mid-60s.
LINDA: When Spock went by that.
ADAMUS: But isn't – that's a good point, I'm glad you bring it up – isn't there still a lot of attachment to the old? I don't care whether it's with Jesus or Buddha or Spock. Not that they're in the same category necessarily. (laughter)
LINDA: Pretty much!
ADAMUS: Pretty much. For her, yeah.
LINDA: Trekker is a trekker.
ADAMUS: Jesus didn't rate quite so high, Spock's way up there.
That's another interesting thing. It's the time of … you know, you have cherished beliefs. You've got your statues on your altar at home or on your inner altar, and almost afraid to let go. And yes, honoring, honoring, that's great. But you're going to find those attachments changing, and expect it. Accept it. Allow it. The things that you've held on to are going to change in their relevance and in your connection with them. They're not going to go away, but if you've had a deep connection to, well, me (Adamus chuckles), even that's going to change. That's going to change.
Okay, let's keep going. Experiences, inner experiences since first of year.
EMMA: Huge, intense, multidimensional and wonderful.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Good. How about physical?
EMMA: Oh gosh! (she chuckles) My body is going crazy.
EMMA: But, okay, not crazy like …
EMMA: Okay. Ehh …
ADAMUS: No, it is going crazy like. It's the same difference. Body and mind – really essentially the same.
EMMA: Yes. Okay, it's like. It's trans- …
ADAMUS: Does it feel weird to be on camera with all your friends watching?
ADAMUS: And you're on like worldwide and multidimensional. Does that feel weird?
EMMA: A little bit.
ADAMUS: A little bit.
ADAMUS: Okay. You see what I just did?
EMMA: Distract me!
ADAMUS: Distraction! Yeah, because why? You were going to go mental on me, and I didn't want that. I want you to share. Body. What's going on with the body?
EMMA: It's like transforming.
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah.
ADAMUS: Does it hurt?
EMMA: Sometimes yes.
ADAMUS: Yeah. And are you trying to control it with your, with your brain stuff?
EMMA: Yeah, pretty much!
ADAMUS: Pretty much. Yeah. (she giggles) Yeah, kind of yeah. And it doesn't work. Does it?
EMMA: It doesn't at all.
ADAMUS: Ahh! You see?
EMMA: Mm hmm.
ADAMUS: You're not the only one …
EMMA: No, you're not the only ones.
ADAMUS: … that's been going through this.
EMMA: Believe me.
EMMA: Okay, yeah.
ADAMUS: Good. So, the rest of your experience, inner experience. Have you had any, like, what I call, curtain opening moments? In other words, ahh! Just suddenly …
ADAMUS: Yes. Like revealing something about so deep within yourself.
EMMA: Mm hmm.
ADAMUS: And then you have a hard time explaining it to other people.
EMMA: I quit.
ADAMUS: So you don't have a hard time. You just quit. (she giggles) Okay, that makes sense.
EMMA: I quit trying to explain.
ADAMUS: Yeah, because it doesn't work. Does it?
EMMA: It doesn't work.
ADAMUS: It's actually … thank you. Thank you.
EMMA: Oh. (she blows him a kiss)
ADAMUS: It's actually … (Adamus blows a kiss back) It's actually …
EMMA: You are gorgeous. (to Linda; laughter and people turn to look)
ADAMUS: Okay, attention up here. (more laughter) You've tried to explain to your friends, your family, even to others that are kind of Shaumbra. It doesn't really work, and in a way that's good, because for right now – for right now – I'd rather have you have that inner radiance. Kind of keep it to yourself. Feel it for yourself. The minute you start blurting it out – makyo; and then it doesn't work so well and you get tangled up in words, and then you get frustrated. Then you feel like a fool, and then everybody is like looking at you, like, “Hm, okay.” And you're like, “Gah, why do I do that? I just keep my mouth …” Yeah. Just whheewww! (Sucking in his breath)
We're going to a place where it is true kharisma radiating from inside you, emanating from within you, rather than “wah, wah, wah, wah.” Like that. Yeah. That's how you're going to hear yourself in the future. You're going to look back on yourself now and go, “It was just going 'wrahh, wrahh, wrahh, wrahh'” Like that. “What was … there was nothing coming out!” And you're just going to stand there as the Master that you are – hmmmm – or not. (a few chuckles) Even just like, yeah, but just in your kharisma. Wooo! Ahhh! Okay. That's where we're going. Thank you.
Couple more. Inner experience.
SHAUMBRA 4 (man): Difficult to explain. It's already been said.
ADAMUS: (chuckling) Good.
High? Low? Dark? Light?
SHAUMBRA 4: Mm. Probably a bit of both.
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah.
SHAUMBRA 4: Sort of a mixture.
SHAUMBRA 4: Never really the same thing.
ADAMUS: Could I ask you a question?
SHAUMBRA 4: Mm. (nodding)
ADAMUS: You should always say no to that. (laughter)
SHAUMBRA 4: Well, I can't really say no. You're going to ask me anyway. Right?
ADAMUS: So have you personally felt kind of numb, a numbness?
SHAUMBRA 4: Yeah, I have from time to time.
ADAMUS: Yeah. And kind of wondering why …
SHAUMBRA 4: What is that?
ADAMUS: What is that? Brain numb and body numb and sensitivity feeling numb. Yeah. And at other times feeling so open that you wished you were numb.
SHAUMBRA 4: That too.
ADAMUS: That too. So that's to my point. You've got all this going on and there is a time of numbness. Like certain days where you're just like, “Where is the anything? I just feel like a rock. And it's just … ehh, cannot get excited about anything. I don't even want to think about sex or food or anything. Ehh, nah. Just …” That was funny, by the way. (a few chuckles) Oh, not with this group. Okay. No. Some of you are laughing online. This group, you tell a sex joke, “Huh? Huhh? (laughter) “Oh yeah, I remember. It was back in the 60s with Spock. (more laughter) It was logical sex.” (Adamus chuckles) Spock having sex … (Adamus' illustrates by standing with a blank look on his face, then a brief but blank smile; lots of laughter)
LINDA: Really?! Really?!
ADAMUS: Let's do that one more time.
SHAUMBRA 4: Thank you for sharing that with us, by the way.
ADAMUS: Spock having sex. (Adamus does the stance again)
LINDA: With who?! How do you know? (more laughter, Adamus giggling)
ADAMUS: My dear. You are the one that dressed up. You're the one acting the part. It's only …
LINDA: I'm sorry. I can sooo relate to being a Vulcan.
ADAMUS: … you being the straight man to my mastery.
LINDA: Sorry, sorry.
ADAMUS: So, at times feeling really numb, that you wouldn't even laugh at a good sex joke, much less a Spock joke; other times feeling so raw, so raw, I mean, that everything, just the sound of a bee close by is disturbing, even a butterfly close by. It's just too intense, colors intense and everything.
What's happening with this? Numb one day, oversensitive the next. What's happening with this?
SHAUMBRA 4: New Energy?
ADAMUS: Yeah, well. (chuckling) Yes and no. It's all New Energy. Yes. But what's happening I'll explain in a moment. I'm setting myself up for my perfect explanations. That's all I'm doing.
SHAUBRA 4: Sorry for messing it up.
ADAMUS: My future is coming into the present. Yeah, perfect integration. But these things are happening. Yeah. Good. And be comfortable with it. Don't try to make sense out of it or logic out of it. Don't try to control it. Eh? There are a lot of good controllers in here, but don't try to control it. Good. Thank you.
Are you enjoying this gathering so far?
SHAUMBRA 4: It's better than watching it on the video camera.
LINDA: Thank you for being here.
ADAMUS: Did you like watching it on the video camera?
SHAUMBRA 4: It was all right.
ADAMUS: Ehh, it was okay.
SHAUMBRA 4: This is better. But, you know, it was all right.
ADAMUS: Ehh, eh, it was okay.
LINDA: Thank you for being here.
ADAMUS: Okay. Good.
LINDA: And thank you for cooperating with Adamus.
SHAUMBRA 4: Yes.
ADAMUS: Yes. Next. Yeah.
SAM: So I've been feeling a …
ADAMUS: (imitating him and counting the words) So I've been feeling …
SAM: Oh, okay. How many words is that?
ADAMUS: You're done. Thank you.
SAM: Am I done? Yay‼ All right! (some laughter) Disentangling myself from mass consciousness's perception of life.
SAM: And my own inner trappings with that and identity with it as well. And allowing myself to be frustrated with it, and that's okay.
What did you say? (Adamus chuckles)
SAM: Was that all mumbling? I'm sorry.
ADAMUS: I was hearing wrah, wrah, and it kind of … I want you to get to right here (heart). Go in the house, if you know what I mean.
SAM: You do. I do. (pausing slightly) Letting go of a …
ADAMUS: Yeah, no.
SAM: … ideas about how life is supposed to lived and just living it.
ADAMUS: Yeah, it sounds kind of sleepy.
SAM: I have been sleepy! I've been real sleepy.
ADAMUS: Now we're getting somewhere! (some laughter)
SAM: Yeah, I've been sleeping a ton.
ADAMUS: Why? Why? Why? Why? Now, we're getting somewhere.
ADAMUS: See, after we get through all this surface stuff. Why have you been sleeping? What's been happening?
SAM: Well, I get inspired and I reach out to people I feel are engaged or at least interested in what I have to say.
ADAMUS: In your sleep?
SAM: No, no. In my waking life.
ADAMUS: Let's talk about your sleep.
SAM: Okay. What am I doing in my sleep?
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah.
SAM: It's …
LINDA: None of your business. (laughter)
SAM: It's active, but it's nothing too fantastic. It's kind of Near Realm stuff.
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah. But what is happening? Why are you sleeping a lot? What's really going on here?
SAM: I feel limited. Unstimulated.
ADAMUS: Could I give you my perspective on it?
SAM: Well you're going – I would like you to. (laughter)
ADAMUS: Where are you going?! (Adamus chuckles)
Sleep. It doesn't really matter right now. Even dream states are going to be so different and sometimes just boring. A lot of times right now old stuff is coming into your dream states and a lot of times it's just like … those dreams just go on and on and on and on and don't really make sense. And you'd like a good sexy dream once in a while, but it's just not there. The sleep is so important for all of you right now, when it calls, and changing sleep patterns. But you're going through intense changes. It's a time for your body and your mind to kind of be quiet. It's kind of a renovation time.
ADAMUS: Renovating the house, as they say.
ADAMUS: Yeah, yes. Good. Good. Thank you.
SAM: Mm hmm.
ADAMUS: Okay, one more. What's been happening since the first of the year?
LINDA: Oh my god, she raised her hand.
ADAMUS: Inner feelings and perspectives. Yes.
LADONNA: Well, I have questions. So I've been on a spiritual journey. I know. I'm not even going to – we're not going to count the things, so …
LADONNA: Okay, I just.
ADAMUS: I'm counting.
LADONNA: For like four years I changed my life. I stopped being a Cristian, the best thing that's ever happened to me.
ADAMUS: Oh no! (they chuckle)
LADONNA: Don't talk to my parents about it!
ADAMUS: Could I ask you a question? How does one stop being a Cristian?
LADONNA: You …
ADAMUS: Do you just sign a paper – “I'm no longer a Cristian.”
LADONNA: Well, it's a big deal.
LADONNA: I held on to it for another 10 or 15 years beyond … it's a huge deal.
LADONNA: Because that's how we grew up.
ADAMUS: Yeah. But to be a Cristian in the first place, what did you have to do, to qualify?
LADONNA: Believe in Christ and do all the things that were proper.
ADAMUS: What believe in Christ? I mean, what … it's like, what's there not to believe in?
LADONNA: Well, I don't know.
ADAMUS: I mean, okay.
LADONNA: I grew up that way and we were ingrained. It was hard to give up. So I found this …
ADAMUS: Yes, it is, by the way.
LADONNA: I've been on this journey for four years.
LADONNA: And …
ADAMUS: Is this another Cristian journey?
LADONNA: No. I don't think so. But I feel like … (Adamus chuckles) Okay, so this is my question.
ADAMUS: Let's stop right there!
LADONNA: This is my question.
ADAMUS: We'll get there.
LADONNA: I have tried so hard to be divine inside.
LADONNA: And I'm in chronic pain. (on the verge of tears)
LADONNA: And, I don't know if, like, why is it physically coming out that way? I'm trying to be so …
ADAMUS: You said it! Right before you said you're in chronic pain. “I am trying so hard.”
LADONNA: Not to be in chronic pain. But I am trying so hard to be divine.
ADAMUS: But you are trying so hard for your divinity. It's nothing about trying hard, my dear.
LADONNA: (now crying) Well, why does it come out in pain?
ADAMUS: Because you're trying so hard, because you're still carrying around the old Christ. Get Christ, get Jesus off the cross.
ADAMUS: Yeah. And yourself. It hurts being up there. It really does. I tried it one time.
LADONNA: But I don't get why the pain is coming. I'm trying, like, you would have thought years ago when I was living in this bondage of beliefs …
LADONNA: … and …
ADAMUS: Stop right there.
ADAMUS: Are you not now?
LADONNA: I thought I wasn't …
ADAMUS: Well …
LADONNA: I just don't need the pain.
ADAMUS: Some of these things go sooo deep. You said it, and that's what I love about you, all of you. You say it, but you don't realize it. It's right here, but it's missing. Jesus! (laughter)
LADONNA: Not Jesus! (laughing and wiping her tears)
ADAMUS: You said it! It's right here, but you're missing it – “I'm working so hard at my divinity.” Why?? This isn't a Cristian church here. (she chuckles) This isn't a synagogue. This isn't a mosque. We don't try hard.
LADONNA: Okay. But now that I know what I want …
ADAMUS: You didn't hear what I said. And that's so indicative of … oh! (she's giggles) We … ohhhh! (laughter) We don't work at it. We don't work at our divinity, our enlightenment, our realization, because it's natural. It's only when one considers it unnatural do they work at it. When they don't consider themselves worthy, then they work at it. When you … (he rests his hands on someone's head; LaDonna laughs; Adamus kisses the person's head) When you stop working at all of it, including fighting your own beliefs …
ADAMUS: … including fighting yourself and Cristianity and everything else; when you simply allow, my dear, when you just allow, it'll be like a storm, a torrential hurricane storm coming over you at first, but to clear you. That's all. And you don't work against the storm and you don't try to figure the storm out – “Why did Jesus send the storm?” – and all the rest of that. You just allow, because this thing of realization is absolutely natural. Your body – your body wants to have this, but in a way, there's still a resistance because of old implants that say, “No, the body, it's not … ooh, whoo, the body does bad things.” I mean, it fornicates and it does, yeah, that too. Yeah. It does all those things.
So you have all these things and you're trying to figure them out. You're trying to make logic of them. You don't have to.
So if you choose right now in this moment, you can stop all the trying, all the effort, all the “What am I doing wrong?” Not a thing.
ADAMUS: Stop thinking. (she chuckles) No, I'm so serious.
ADAMUS: This isn't a path anymore. You came along a path up to a point. No path.
ADAMUS: No path. It's just you receiving …
LADONNA: I've been doing the I Exist every morning.
ADAMUS: Yeah, eh. Now I'm going to challenge you on that.
LADONNA: You told us to do it!
ADAMUS: Go ahead and stand up. But I hear you doing the I Exist, and then you add things on it, my dear. (she gasps) I hear you.
LADONNA: Oh my god!
ADAMUS: Oh my god, Jesus! (some chuckles) It is about … the I Exist is just that. I Exist. Shut up! No more – “Yahng, yahng, yahng! I exist to be abundant. I exist because …” That's it. (she gasps again) I Exist.
LADONNA: Oh wow!
ADAMUS: That's it. I Exist. And until you feel that and you're having an absolute mental, physical, spiritual orgasm all over the place, you haven't gotten it yet. You “I Exist, because today is sunny. I Exist, because …” Shut up! (she chuckles) You know exactly what I mean.
LADONNA: Yeah. Yeah. I do it every single day.
ADAMUS: Absolutely, and the list gets long! “I Exist, because I used to be a Cristian, and I still am.” What?! “I Exist …” Agh! I listen sometimes. I scream. (she chuckles) Don't do that! I Exist. Okay?
ADAMUS: I Exist. And until you absolutely – it shakes in your body and tremors in your mind and you feel it like an absolute sensual orgasm, stop all the other crap with it. It's “I Exist. I Exist.” It's too simple for you maybe. What's here and what's missing? I Exist. It's here, but you're missing it because you have to put all of these other things on it.
I Exist. And then it becomes a feeling.
It's not logical. It doesn't make sense in a very crazy world. But once you get it, once you feel it, that's it. You're home.
I do watch, by the way. I don't – I don't … not your private, private moments, but, you know, just … well, a few. (laughter) I have no means of recording, but I'm working on it. (more laughter)
SART: Only with one eye!
ADAMUS: Spock orgasm. (Adamus does the stance again with silly look on his face; laughter) Okay. Yes.
CRISTIAN: They were two tough months.
ADAMUS: Two tough months.
CRISTIAN: For the body, the coughing.
CRISTIAN: The nose. Even the ears, the eyes.
CRISTIAN: The stomach.
ADAMUS: Let's stop right there. (laughter)
CRISTIAN: Something different.
CRISTIAN: Like I cannot recognize the reaction of my body like before.
ADAMUS: Yeah. I want to know what's going on though.
CRISTIAN: And also …
ADAMUS: Go ahead. Don't let me interrupt.
CRISTIAN: Also …
ADAMUS: But I want to know what's … (laughter) Yes.
CRISTIAN: In the mind also very much tension, and also the tendency in the relations with others to reject them, to … (he sighs)
ADAMUS: Could I really go right straight in here?
ADAMUS: Yeah, thank you. You should say no, but… (Adamus chuckles) Have you had some overwhelming fears, particularly in the last couple of months, deep, deep fears, unexplainable? Ohh, like not darkness, not like afraid of the dark kind of thing, but fears that you've never quite felt that deep before.
CRISTIAN: Yes. It's true.
ADAMUS: Anybody else? (some audience members agree) Where does that come from?
I mean, there are day-to-day fears. There is the thing, you know, you worry about money. You worry about your health. You worry about your ex-wife and ex-husband, those type of things, or what you're going to do to your ex-wife and ex-husband. (some laughter) But I'm talking about a fear that's so different, so personal and so overwhelming, and you wonder where is that coming from? And there's almost a tendency then to shut yourself down, because you could manage the old, the day-to-day crap fears. You know, just the regular stuff that comes up and even your phobias – I'm not looking at anybody – but even your phobias and fears. You know, you realize that was kind of manageable. But here a fear that comes in that is so personal that you don't even know how to handle it. I was just taking a guess.
CRISTIAN: It was like all the phobias and all the fears come together and the mind try to figure out what is about, but no chance.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Good. Could I give you a hug?
ADAMUS: Oh. (they hug tenderly) I miss my old land. Mm. (Christian is from Romania)
CRISTIAN: Thank you.
CRISTIAN: Thank you.
ADAMUS: Mmm. Ohhh. (some chuckles) An amazing place. Amazing. Going through a lot of its own transformations. Thank you for being here. Thank you. You're going to bring something very, very special back with you.
So, my friends, why do I ask these questions to the annoyance of some? (Adamus chuckles) Because I want you to feel, I want you to hear that what you think is just yours, others are going through. That should tell you something; that we're going through this changeover, makeover process. We're going into something, but it does have its challenges. It doesn't make sense. It's not logical. You want to fight it and control it. You want to work at it, but you can't. You shouldn't have to.
First of all, you, the human, should not have to take responsibility for all this. Kind of like … you didn't create it! No, you really didn't, in a very interesting way. You don't need to work at it. It is so natural. It's just there. And I see you, all of you, working away at it. Just take a deep breath. We're going to have a nice non-working merabh session in a little bit, but just take a deep breath.
You know, enlightenment – I prefer the word now “realization” – is a puzzle with only one piece. It's a puzzle with only one piece, but yet the adept working their way feels like it's this very challenging maze. Kind of like a labyrinth that they have to go through and like they're being tested by Sprit and put through all the rigors to see if they're worthy. And all the time asking yourself – that's this spirit that you're putting up there – and saying, “Am I worthy?” and “What test do I have to pass?” It's just you.
We can cut through a lot of that right now. A lot of that, the self-testing and this “Am I worthy enough?” and “Am I strong enough?” and “Am I light enough?” We can just cut through a lot of that by just saying let's cut through a lot of it. (some chuckles) By just placing our consciousness beyond that, beyond the old Christian Jesus or whatever you happen to have in your way. Beyond having to prove yourself to yourself. Let's be done with that.
You'll never get there. You absolutely will never get there. And knowing a lot, or all of the Ascended Masters as I do, they tried. They tried making sense out of it. They tried figuring it out. They tried testing themselves over and over and over again until they collapsed out of exhaustion or death or both and realized “All I had to do was put my consciousness in the realization, and then it was there.” Then it was there, step out of the way, allow it to come. Yes, things will change in your life. Your body is going to hurt.
I would go so far as to say that the time of the greatest body hurting is going to be kind of like right about now. We're just coming into the astrological “your body's going to hurt like hell” cycle, and it's going to last probably till mid-late summer. That's not so bad.
SART: Yeah! (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: Oh, piece of cake.
And that's appropriate that your body's going to hurt, because it's going through changes. Some of you have gotten very, very ill because your body is going through changes. It's not betraying you. It's not trying to tell you anything.
It hurts more when you start worrying “What am I doing wrong? What lesson is there?” and you start pulling up a lot of old beliefs and old junk. Your body is still going to go through the same basic transformation, it's just more resistance on it, and that's what you're feeling. Why all the pain? Because of all the resistance. It's pretty easy.
So you take a deep breath and you just realize, ah, this physical being that's been kind of the source of a lot of bad feelings, bad thoughts – you even consider it kind of a bad aspect and you have kind of a strange relationship – well, sure, it's going to be in some pain going into the integration, because it's trying to shed all the stuff that's been placed on it.
So your body is going to be in pain. Your mind's going to be in chaos. All this stuff is going to be going on, and that's okay. It's actually kind of cool. I'll show you in a minute.
But this thing about enlightenment, it's really just a puzzle with one piece. It's not difficult to figure out, unless you start trying to figure it out, making logic, making sense, figuring out what the path is and putting all this other mental stuff. And I see all of you doing it nearly every day. That's when you take a deep breath, “Whoa.” This is a natural occurrence, the realization. It's going to happen. But the more you resist, the more you try to figure it out and do all sorts of strange ceremonies and other things around it, the more it's going to hurt.
Where we are going, Shaumbra, what we're going to be doing during, let's say, the rest of my stay … and stop predicting when I'm going to leave. (Adamus chuckles) It's a great Shaumbra drama – “How long is Adamus going to be here?” Well, until we've got about five that really have a realization.
So where we're going to go, what we're going to be doing, kind of entering into our next phase, you could say. Three things. And Spock … can you write, Spock? Or do you just think and it shows up on the screen? Can you …
LINDA: It's up to you. (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: Okay. Just …
LINDA: Dear Adamus, you are the one that tells us to dress up, play roles, and then you play with me like this?!
ADAMUS: Yes! Acting. Aren't you happy of all the attention? All the playful…
LINDA: Let's see. Bad attention is better than none.
ADAMUS: The playfulness. The playfulness. And you realize that next month half of everybody here is going to come dressed up as somebody. No, they admire you. “Ohhh, gosh! Linda gets dressed up as dead people. Oh! Isn't that great!”
LINDA: You told us to dress up!!
ADAMUS: We love it. We love it, don't we? (audience applause) Yes. Okay.
Spock's partner having sex. (Adamus stands there completely motionless and blank)
LINDA: What?!! (laughter and groans from the audience; Adamus laughing) No rest for the wicked.
ADAMUS: Good. I'm even amazing Cauldre today. Normally, he's panicky.
Where We're Going – Three Things
So, where we're going, three things. You can write it or you can think it. Let's put it up on the board here, so those who don't hear the words can at least see the pictures. (Adamus chuckles)
So, first, consciousness. Ahh, you're going to get sick of the word consciousness. Cauldre even wrote an article about consciousness. That's a tough word, and, yes, there are better words for it.
LINDA: You want that on the board?
ADAMUS: Consciousness. Can you spell it?
LINDA: Yes, can you?
ADAMUS: It's a hard one to spell, especially …
LINDA: No, it's not!
ADAMUS: … when somebody's talking and you're trying to write and you're trying be logical and you're frustrated with me and then you misspell it. You forget the other “s.”
LINDA: I didn't forget it. I was trying to make room for it. (she spells it “Consciouss”) That's not right! (lots of laughter) You are so bad. Bad, bad, bad, bad, bad!
ADAMUS: Zzzzzzz! No logic. Can't even spell. Zzzz! (more laughter)
So consciousness. You can go to the next page or erase or do whatever.
Consciousness is going to be so important. Consciousness is simply awareness, realization, but at a level you couldn't have imagined before in your logical mind.
Consciousness – the awareness that goes into every level, every realm. Not just awareness of facts and figures. That is rather meaningless. Not just awareness that there's a person sitting next to you. That's obvious. But consciousness, awareness, that we'll get into in a moment, but of things so much richer and more fulfilling.
So consciousness, awareness. It's the I Exist. And I know some of you say, “Oh yeah, I get it. I Exist.” No, you don't get it otherwise you wouldn't be saying it anymore. You would just be so radiant, charismatic.
ADAMUS: Yes. I Exist is not a mantra to be said over and over to bore yourself. You bore yourself in other ways. You don't need another way to bore yourself. (Adamus chuckles) Sex. (Adamus does the stance)
SART: Wow! (some laughter)
ADAMUS: Shaumbra sex. (he stand's there with eyes darting back and forth as if wondering what's happening; more laughter)
LINDA: That's not funny! That's not funny! You're naughty! (Adamus is laughing)
ADAMUS: You do have to laugh once in a while. The greatest, greatest thing about humans in this planet is the ability to laugh, to have humor. There is such conflict, but somewhere along the line, humans turned it into a humor, laughter or a soap opera. It's one of the two. But this conflict, this challenge, it can actually be pretty amusing at times. When you can laugh at yourself – ah! – then that's mastery.
Consciousness. Awareness, but not thinking awareness. Awareness where actually there is almost no active thought. Awareness so that there are no words any longer. No need for words. No need for definition, any of that. That is consciousness. And then the Master learns after that state of true awareness, then how to communicate it. And we're going to be going there, more and more about communication.
Now communication is an interesting thing, because as I'm talking here and communicating, you're hearing the words, especially if you speak English. If you don't, it's like “Ynah, ynah, ynah!” But the real communication going on here, ah, the real communication is in the eyes, yes, is in the gestures. But actually the real communication is coming from a very deep connection. Everything else is kind of distraction. You think you're hearing words or seeing something or feeling the touch or something. That's only a portion. The real communication is taking place at a different level.
And as I'm here with you doing such an elegant job in distracting you, and … by the way, it's a bit chilly in here. It's freezing. (audience agrees) It's freezing. You see that other distraction? I really don't care, because I don't have a body, but little distraction. Oh! It's so good.
So where was I? (someone says “Communication”) Yeah, communicating. You don't remember, do you. Communicating.
I'm up here distracting and double distracting. I can go about five or six layers deep with distraction with humans before they pass out. (some giggles) What's really happening right now is you communicating with you.
What's here and what's missing? It's the Shaumbra riddle. Yes. Ah, tee-shirts, I can see them. So can some of you. You communicating with you.
I want you to be conscious. I want you to be aware of … I just want to sit here and … (he sits in Einat's chair and pretends to mess with her sound equipment)
ADAMUS: I want you to be aware of how you're communicating with you while I'm distracting you. That's the real benefit of our gatherings when we get together like this. You're analyzing what I'm saying or you're thinking about what I'm saying, but you're really drifting off. Do you realize that about maybe six percent of your attention span is here and the rest is in some sort of mess in here? And I say some sort of mess, because … no I don't mean that negative, but it is pretty funny.
It's in this kind of egh, egh, kind of bleghh thing going on, and you're trying to figure stuff out. And oh, and then you're having flashbacks of something and thinking of what you didn't do and what you're going to do. This whole mechanism, this kind of Rube Goldberg-ish kind of weird contraption that's happening inside with … so about 94 percent of the time we've been here together today, you got all this stuff going on here. Every once in a while, “Oh yeah, Adamus is talking. Oh! He's going to do his sex shtick again. Okay, good. Good.” (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: I won't do anymore. (Adamus chuckles) What … would you tell me, how does a – what do you call these beings from your planet?
ADAMUS: Vulcans. Come on up here. (someone “Oh no”) Oh yeah. (someone says “Every seven years”) Every seven years, whether they need or … yeah. So how does a Vulcan have sex? (he sits in her audience chair)
LINDA: I don't know anymore. I'm so fully evolved. You just have sex like a monkey. (some giggles)
ADAMUS: As a human or as a Vulcan?
LINDA: I'm half Vulcan, half human.
ADAMUS: Okay, show us how Vulcan and human have sex.
LINDA: Geoff couldn't handle that. (laughter and some applause)
ADAMUS: Funny. Funny. Geoff's not here right now. (laughter)
LINDA: Oh, but he'd hear about it.
ADAMUS: I could make him forget … (more laughter)
LINDA: You couldn't handle it either.
ADAMUS: … for hundreds of years. Yeah.
LINDA: You couldn't handle it either.
ADAMUS: Yeah. (more laughter) How about like this. (Adamus puts his hands on her shoulders; she resists) No, no, no. Come here. (laughter) We'll get a side shot. Yeah. That's how they have sex. (laughter as he acts it out) How about just nnnnnhhh! (standing closely in front of her) Ahh! Ahh!
LINDA: Oh, that's a good reason to be, yeah.
ADAMUS: She's not even smiling after that one. (more laughter) Not even an “Ahhhh!” It was just like, “That did not make sense.” (spoken like a robot; more laughter) We'll try again later.
Okay. Consciousness. Yes. Where's that word on the board? I want it to stand out.
LINDA: Oh, oh. Wait, wait.
ADAMUS: Consciousness. That's where we're going. Consciousness. Awareness. I Exist. This isn't just another discipline. It's not another practice. It is everything.
Consciousness is everything. I've told groups recently, it's not the universe out there with a little dot of … it's not like … (laughter, as Linda's having trouble writing the word correctly) I don't want to bring attention to her writing, but I'm going to pretend this screen is the universe. Pretend this screen is the universe, the physical universe. Not like there's a little dot of consciousness in there. (Linda finally writes “Consciousness”; audience says “Yay!” and applause) It's not like there's a little dot of consciousness inside – make a little tiny dot there, just a little, yeah – inside a big universe. But that's the way people, you, mostly others, not so much you anymore, but that's the way people live.
They're like, “Here I am in this big universe,” and they don't even call it consciousness, but “Here I am. Big universe. I'm just a little speck.” Do you realize that's the basis of belief – that's a bigger belief than Jesus – is just, “Well, I'm just this little thing happening inside a great big thing, and I don't know where I'm going to go with this, but we'll see where the thing wants to take me.” That's kind of the consciousness of people.
Are you warmer now? (audience says “Yes”) Are you too hot? (audience says “No”)
LINDA: Not yet.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Good.
Let's flip that around. Consciousness is everything and in that everything of consciousness there's a little tiny, tiny, tiny spot called the universe. Yeah. And that big consciousness – I'm not talking about you and billions of other people and billions of alien beings and a few Vulcans and the rest of that. I'm talking about you. You're the whole screen and inside that screen is a little bit of universe but a lot of other things.
What's here and what's also missing – consciousness. Consciousness. And unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, but unfortunately you cannot think your way into consciousness. Do you know that? Well, you don't, because you've been trying. You cannot think your way into consciousness. It can only be experienced.
So we're going to be going there, and we're going to be, as Cauldre came up with one of his marketing things, it's going to be Applied Consciousness. We're not going to talk too much about consciousness, because otherwise it goes mental. We will be applying consciousness. (someone says “Thank you”) Yeah, thank you.
But in doing so, you're going to go through a lot of challenges. You're going to try to think your way through it. You're going to try to make logic of it. I'm going to try to wrestle you down to the ground and try to get you out of your mind and into yourself. Into yourself.
Applied Consciousness, because where consciousness is applied, there comes life.
Now, I want you to feel – you'll do a little bit of thinking, but I want you to feel – where has your consciousness been? Applied Consciousness, that creates reality. Where's it been? Not your thoughts. There's a huge difference between thoughts and consciousness. That's why I started out asking you today what's been the inner feeling or journey these past couple of months? And a lot of you started into your thoughts. What have you felt? Have you felt the grip of deep fear? I hope so. No, I really hope so, because once you start allowing that, that means you're opening up. Yeah. It's scary. But then it's amazing, because, oh, that fear, that overwhelming darkness, it feels like a big magnet, a magnet of darkness pulling you in.
First of all, you realize “I'm alive!” because you feel that so intensely. And secondly, something amazing happens when you get to that point. “I'm just going to allow it, because it is all mine. It is all mine.” In other words, there's not some boogeyman, demons, devils, Satan or anything else.
Can you allow yourself? Can you be in such a place of grace to say, “I don't care. That fear magnet can pull me right in, because it's all mine.” It's all just part of the act, part of the experience.
We're going to be going into consciousness in a very applied, but a very non-mental way. Where you place consciousness is your reality. And I'm not talking about trivial things like making yourself five years younger or losing ten pounds or any of that. That is child's play. Some of that is deliberate distraction. Some of it is non-intentional distraction. It's child's play, as is the alchemy, the old consideration of alchemy that “I'm going to turn stone into gold.” I'm so glad that we learned that trick a long time ago, how to get rid of those who are not truly interested in realization. They're interested in just playing the human game and that's all, in rather kind of a devious way. So we get rid of them with those distractions.
We are going to go into Applied Consciousness, into whole new worlds.
Second, and very important, and you may want some help with spelling this. (Linda scoffs) Perhaps a new page.
LINDA: I'm working on it. I'm working on it.
ADAMUS: Don't work at it. Just whooosh!
LINDA: It keeps doing this weird thing.
LINDA: (whispers) I'm coming. I'm coming (she runs down the aisle to John Kuderka for technical help.)
ADAMUS: Next. So logical. One Vulcan is going to help the other Vulcan. (laughter and audience says “Ohhh!”)
All right, I will reveal here. I will reveal something never told and very deeply personal. They knew each other in what you call another planet, another place, an alien place; were good buddies, good friends. They're both relatively new here to this planet and still kind of trying to figure out. So there's a bond, a kind of a Spock or spook bond going on. (Adamus chuckles) Am I right or what? (someone responds) “Thank you,” his wife says. (referring to John's wife; laughter) Yes! (Adamus chuckles) And let's bring the temperature down just a little bit. Okay. We're going to play temperature today.
Okay, did you have to ask him how to spell the next word? (someone says “We don't even know it”) Oh, we don't know the next word. The next, word very important. We've talked about it in Keahak, and it will become even more and more an important part of your vocabulary and will allow you to have richness and joy in life. “And.” A-n-d.
ADAMUS: And. (Adamus chuckles) It's an A … ND. (Linda writes it on the board)
“And” is going to be so important in what we're doing because you're going to realize that your body can be in pain and it's not. You can be having other amazing experiences. You're not singular anymore. You can be logical and absolutely sensual. You can be in the grips of this magnetic fear and sitting beside a lake watching the butterflies and singing songs and enjoying a bottle of wine.
Now, humans are … are you getting bored?
ADAMUS: Good, good. (Adamus chuckles) Humans …
LINDA: How about annoyed?
ADAMUS: Yeah. Humans, and you know this about humans. Humans are singular. Are you annoyed and what else? Charmed. I see it. I absolutely see it. Yes. Annoyed and so in love with Spock. (Adamus chuckles)
“And.” Oh! So simple. But if you went out and tried to explain it to others, they would just kind of look at you. But you're going to be living the “and” life, meaning you can be having a bad day and equally a good day.
Now, that does not make sense. That is not logical.
LINDA: Actually, that does.
ADAMUS: That does! (Adamus chuckles) That does not make sense, but it absolutely is natural. Isn't that the funny thing?
You know, humans get into this very singular thing, and they get more and more boxed in and boxed in. Actually, they work at being more configured. Humans work at being more configured in their mind and their body and their actions and their thoughts. Ohhh! It's exhausting, because you try to control your thoughts and your body and everything about your life. You know exactly what I'm talking about. You try to control everything. You become configured. That's a nice word for hypnotized, controlled. Controlling yourself. You become so calculated in everything that you squeeze life out of life.
Worse than that, you take consciousness out of consciousness. What's here and what's missing at the same time? Consciousness. Life itself. It's here. It's all here. We're not going anyplace. Not going anyplace. We're just realizing that it's here and it's not here, and that's what the Master knows. Ah ha, ha!
The Master doesn't suddenly have realization that ends their own stupidity, their own innocence, their own vulnerability. They don't suddenly have this realization that gives them all the intelligence in the world. No. No. They're going to be “and.” They're intelligence and stupid. They're vulnerable and they're so open. “And.”
Now, typically a human thinks very, very linear. They throw in a little salt and pepper, a little duality into their linearity, into their focus, just enough to keep it from being so deadly boring. So they throw a little bit of duality – a little light, a little dark, a little pleasure, a little pain, a little good, a little bad.
So the next level of consciousness after singularity is just a little bit of this duality. They don't go beyond that. There's nothing beyond duality. Most people would think nothing beyond black and white, up and down. That's it.
Do you realize that that is probably the outer limits of consciousness?
ADAMUS: Outer limits! Oh no! (laughter)
LINDA: Ohh! Wow!
ADAMUS: It's sort of the outer limits of consciousness, but we're going to the Twilight Zone.
ADAMUS: I did that for her.
LINDA: Oh, you're singing my song. You want to have sex? (lots of laughter)
ADAMUS: Now, most humans … yeah. (demonstrates Vulcan sex again, but with only a twitchy half smile; more laughter) Ohh! (Adamus chuckling) So …
ADAMUS: Can you imagine or feel for a moment not just singularity and not just duality, but actually and, and, and, and.
“What's beyond duality?” one would say. “What's beyond dark and light?”
My dear friends, there are worlds. There are worlds beyond. Duality is just kind of like the basic programming code of this reality. But there are other realities that need no code, that need no programming.
The beautiful thing is it can be experienced here and you can be singular at the same time.
Imagine for a moment all these attributes. “And” – the amazing ability to be innocent, naïve, stupid almost and to know everything. Amazing. Amazing. That's where we're going to go – “and.”
So we're not really going to enlightenment. That would be very singular. No. It's about “and.” And. You can be that human and absolute Master.
It's beautiful because you realize suddenly the act of yourself is no longer limited to, well, the act of yourself. It's the “and.”
Now, it's going to feel uncomfortable at first. And some of you in Keahak have had just a glimpse of it. It'll be a little uncomfortable at first, because the mind is not used to it. The mind says, “Follow that path. Do this thing” or “Go to sleep” But it's not used to multi. It's not used to “and.”
So what do you do when you get uncomfortable? “Oh yeah, and I'm uncomfortable and I'm realizing. And damn it's really hard on my body and it's not really. Heh. And I don't have a body and I have a light body.”
Now, one would basically say it's kind of schizophrenic. (laughter) By the way, do not tell your therapist about this. (more laughter) Not a word. This is just between us.
It seems a little fragmented, but it's not. It's not at all. Suddenly, you realize that there was a reason in the first place for being able to create aspects – not to chase them away, but to create them – and you can start living in this beautiful combination, multidimensional, aspected, logical way of being. No longer confined to just that. I mean, not that that's bad, you know, and I do like your shirt, and it's multi-you. Multi-you.
Now, that brings up a very interesting question. You're going to say, “Well, what is truth? What is reality?” And there is no truth. There is none. Stop searching for truth. It doesn't work. There's no meaning in life. Sorry. There's no truth, because it all becomes the truth.
There's no single truth in the core of the universe hidden away somewhere. There's not. The truth is it's all truth.
Now, if you want to really say, “But where do I find my base, my balance? It's so chaotic, I have to find that comfortable place every once in a while.” I Exist. That's it. That's it. And the rest is “and.”
We're going to be experiencing “and.” You will absolutely be uncomfortable, and you'll probably be a little upset with me, as happens from time to time, because you're going to say, “I didn't realize it was going to be so crazy.” I'll tell you right now. It's going to be a little crazy and fun and so different in a lot of ways. And you can still show up as the average person at the supermarket and they won't bother you. They probably won't even see you.
You realize you can just be human, you can just still have fun at the human act and at the same time you'll be walking through the grocery and the fruits and vegetables are talking to you. Oh, they already are. That's a different problem. (some laughter) And you go through the grocery store and you can be hungry. You're going to be … I've seen a few of you eating at the grocery story, and I'm not talking from your samplers but I'm talking just grabbing food and eating it. But you can go through the grocery – I saw – and you can go through the grocery store and you can just eat energetically and be hungry at the same time.
Now, you would say, “No, if I'm hungry, I have to satisfy, I have to eat.” No, no. You can do both. You know, eating and being hungry is kind of an interesting cocktail, because eating and still being hungry you still have that sensual feeling. Okay, I'm getting off-track. “And.”
And third, very important here in our work – nah, our joy – that we're going to be doing together. We have consciousness, we have “and” and then finally, a very important element, is the synchronous or syncing it all together. Putting it together.
Now, good analogy, good metaphor; most of you now have a laptop and a desktop and a mobile phone and a tablet and all these different – and what other devices – GPSs and your watches and the new watches. You have all these devices. The hell of it is they're not really in phase. They're not synced. Isn't that one of the big frustrations is syncing them … (he pauses and makes a funny face at what Linda has written)
LINDA: You said synchronous. (she spelled it “Synchronis”) That's not even a word. Maybe it is. N-o-u-s? Fine, whatever.
ADAMUS: Yes. So Spock is not always so logical. (Adamus chuckles)
So, my dear friends, synchronous.
Now, using the analogy to all of your devices, they get out of sync. And then you get mad at them, and you get mad at who manufactured them and who made the software. And it's like, “Jesus, can't anybody …” There we go with Jesus again. “Can't anybody put …” Why do they use Jesus like that? (laughter) Jesus! It's almost a curse word now. Jeez- ... and then get dressed up and they come to our Shouds as Jesus and Mary Magdalene. Jeez.
LINDA: Master every month.
ADAMUS: Synchronous, bringing it together. Another word for it would be integration. Integration, but I kind of like synchronous.
So here we have this situation with your mobile devices. They're all out of sync. The calendars don't work together and your contacts and your databases and everything else. Isn't it really just indicative of humans? It's really actually the simplest fix in the world. I'm surprised that they make such a big deal out of it, that they can't just – snap! – figure it out like that. But, oh, they've got all this software and you've got to buy …
Then you have to buy and synchronizing device to synchronize your other device and that device doesn't sync very well with the others, and then you call for customer support and they say, “Well, yes, you bought our synchronous device, but you need to get rid of all of your other devices.” Then you're like, “But I don't have any devices!” and then they say, “Then you're in sync.” (laughter) Wow.
“Yeah, but I don't have my other devices.” “Well, what's more important, all your crap you carry around or being in sync?”
“In sync with nothing,” you'll say. “I don't have … what's there to sync anymore?” “Ah, we solved your problem.” Yes. Yeah. (some laughter)
And you can have your devices. You can have your crap, actually, in realization, in enlightenment. You can have your crap and it can all be in sync or out of sync. It doesn't matter. It's where you're going to put your consciousness.
None of it is what you call eternal or fixed, because you can be out of sync one day. You know, imagine being such the Master you don't care if you're out of sync. You don't care if you've got all these fragments and aspects and unrealized Self and all this. “Wow. It's kind of fun today, playing out of sync,” because you know then the moment you apply your consciousness – Applied Consciousness – you just say, “Oh yeah, now I'm going to go to back into – whoo, ahh – integration.” Being in sync. That's the fun of it.
It's not actually really very much fun if you're always in sync. It's not. It's kind of boring. God, everything just works out. (some chuckles) Everything is just, you know, “I wake up in the morning and I'm healthy and then money just shows up and everybody loves me and there's no traffic and wow, I'm the perfect weight and I haven't aged in years. I'm so tired of this life on this planet.” (audience is chuckling)
LINDA: Sounds kind of Vulcan.
ADAMUS: “I wish I'd get hit by a car, but I'm so perfect that it's not going to happen. (laughter) I'll be here for 500 years. I have to get together with the other vampires, you know.” (Adamus chuckles) So it's kind of boring.
So imagine in this “and” of mastery one day you can just be out of sync. “Oh crap! This is fun. My house just burned down. I don't care though, because there's another bigger one being built. And I don't care about that either.” That is embodied mastery. People have emotions. I've told groups before, Masters are – they're son of a bitches. They're intolerant. They don't put up with any crap. Then the next minute, then they put up with it. And.
Can you imagine really just laying into somebody? (expressing very angrily to them) You don't, because you limit yourself. “I can't do that. That's bad.” Eh, it's actually kind of fun once in a while. “Oooohhhh!” you think, “But to what extent? Could I kill them?” (some chuckles) Ask them first. Don't just do it. (more chuckles)
The ability to be “and,” to be all these things, wherever you want to apply to your consciousness, and it will never get stuck there. Not even in perfection. Trust me, that's so boring. Have fun with it.
And then you start gliding back and forth in time. You start traversing the dimensions. You start experiencing the “and,” Applied Consciousness. And then after that, you start learning – there's not a good word yet, I'll make one up – but you start being able to split consciousness. See right now you think, “Okay, I'm going to put my consciousness here into being synchronized and then here.” Suddenly, you're both at once. And then you're beyond synchronized, and it just keeps going on and on and on and on in the ability to be multi-consciousness, multi-awared. It's amazing. Truly amazing.
Ah! Let's take a deep breath.
And you get there naturally. There's no work at it. There's no work, unless you want to say 'allowing.' That's the only work you have to do. Allowing really isn't work, but to most people it seems like work, because, you know, they don't even want to allow. They just want to go, “Oh, I'm just going to see what happens today.” It's like, well, could you take a moment when you wake up in the morning – “I Exist?” And then later on in a different sentence, “I allow?” They don't want to do that. (someone raises their hand)
Question. She's going to take run the microphone. And would you take this (Spock's phaser) in case you need to beam him up. (some laughter)
ADAMUS: Just in case.
SHAUMBRA 5 (man): Do you get to that point of synchronizing and then you just want to unsynchronize because it's so boring?
ADAMUS: Or do both at once. Can you imagine both at once? How can you be synchronized and unsynchronized at the same time? Why not?
SHAUMBRA 5:Yeah, why not?
ADAMUS: Why not? That's the question. There's no law of physics that would keep that from happening. None. There's no law of emotion or the mind that would keep that from happening. Nobody ever thought about it before.
SHAUMBRA 5:Yeah, it definitely gets boring and then you realize how much you like it. You're like, “Oh my god. I, like, really like that.”
ADAMUS: Oh yeah. That's a point.
SHAUMBRA 5: Yeah, it definitely … it's pretty cool.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Humans don't do so good without drama. It gets boring.
SHAUMBRA 5: Yeah.
ADAMUS: So they'll intentionally screw things up so they can rebuild it.
ADAMUS: Yeah, they do, all the time. There's nothing wrong with that until you get tired of that singularity – drama, drama, drama, drama. But in mastery, it's like, “I'm going to have some drama and I'm going to be non-drama. I'm going to just …” It's the “and.”
When you are so free that you can choose wherever you want to apply your consciousness, and multiple places at the same time, ah! My friends, that is mastery. Embodied mastery.
So those are, you could say, the big categories of what we're going to be doing and experiencing and feeling. If you want to know “Should I stick around for Crimson Circle?” I've just given you the outline, and if it's not for you, that's fine. That's very, very fine.
I'm going to throw in one note about Keahak. Cauldre and Linda addressed it earlier.
Keahak is, as the thing says now, Applied Consciousness. What I've asked the Keahak staff to do is to have Keahak now as still our “spirit in motion,” but we'll get together twice a month for experiences, discussions – well, not discussions, me talking – experiences and delving deeper into each one of these things I just talked about.
Keahak gives you a chance to make a commitment that we're going to work together, you and I, on a personal basis for a year. Yes, we do our group gatherings, but that's just the tip of the iceberg. When you become part of this you're basically saying you're willing to have me around every day. Sounds good until after the second day (laughter), because I do provoke a few people.
ADAMUS: Annoy some others.
ADAMUS: But it's a constant saying, “Let it go. Stop working at it. Stop efforting in it. Stop…” If you're in pain, there's a resistance. There's a reason. You're resisting something. So shut up and take a deep breath and allow. It's that simple.
And my job – I am the Simplifier. I'm the head Simplifier working with you, because you're going to get distracted. You're going to make it very difficult. You're going to bring in a lot of chaos. You're going to overwhelm yourself, and I'm going to come in with my Simplifier stick – looks kind of like this (Einat's mallet for the singing bowls), but longer – and I'm going to help you to simplify. I'm going to say, “You simplify it or we get one of these.” Mm. So …
ADAMUS: Interesting. Yes. That's my Simplifier. Could I have this forever? (to Einat) Thank you.
So, my dear friends, that's where we're going with Keahak. My point is that you don't have to join Keahak to be a good Shaumbra. Not at all. As a matter of fact, I really want you to question whether you should be part of it just because we're talking about it here. It has to be right for you. I want you to really feel into that.
I would actually … could I beam you out for a minute? (Linda sighs heavily and walks to the back of the room) I would actually discourage you from suddenly joining this Keahak group, because it is very, very intense and it costs a lot of money, and it's a big commitment. So don't just jump into it. And the reason I would discourage you first, before I would invite you, is because if you just jump into it – “Ohhh! Here I'm going to spend all this money and I'm going to fix my life” – no, no, no, no, no. You're not. If you're doing it for those reasons, it's going to hurt. It's going to be rough. It's going to be a rough year on you.
If you're doing it because you truly feel that you're willing to go through a major renovation, a change that at times it will be very challenging, and then I'm going to come in and try to simplify it for you, then do consider it. But feel into it. Feel very deeply into it.
It's a beautiful journey of a year with many others from around the world, but at times – not during our sessions but at other times, it can be very – how would you say it, dear Linda? – a bit overwhelming. Yeah. Good way of putting it. Thank you.
Okay, next point. We are going to do a merabh sooner or later. (Linda motions to something she brought for Adamus) She's trying to bribe me with cookies.
Now, I realize we're starting to run short of time and we're not. Yeah, we're going to get this all done. Yeah. Whether, it's 10 minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes, it doesn't matter.
Worlds Around You
Next point. There are worlds around you right now. There are worlds around you. That's why I say what's here but what's missing? There are worlds around you, magnificent worlds – not just butterflies and fairies and things like that – but worlds of sensual, creative experiences, and they're all around you. They're not there. They're right here. There are your multiple worlds, but there are others as well, indescribable in human words or to the human mind.
But yet, you don't see that. You say, “But where are they? I don't see anything. I don't feel anything.” Understanding that there are worlds around you is ultimately a matter of allowing, and in that, in that going into those consciousnesses, you're going to feel at times like you're going to go crazy. And that's actually probably a good sign, because it's breaking down a lot of the old limitations, confinements. There are so many worlds and you have such a desire for them. I do know that. You have such a desire to …
Let me put it this way. It would be like living in a cave and expecting to see the sunrise, and you're not going to. You can think about the sunrise and the sunset. You can think about storm clouds. You can think about the wind. But if you're living in a cave, it's just a thought.
There is an underlying knowingness that there's something going on outside of that cave, a feeling, a deep desire. But until you step out of the cave, you're not going to experience the sunrise. Pretty obvious. Pretty simple.
And one would say, “Okay, well, let's just step out of the cave.” But I want you to consider what's at that door of the cave. Jesus, for one, and he's pissed. (laughter) But not that Jesus, your Jesus and the Jesus of old mass consciousness. And there are tigers and there are dinosaurs and there are people who have hurt you before and there are booby traps and there's the unexpected and there are snakes and insects. And all of your bad dreams and all of your bad experiences are right outside that door.
So when one says, “Well, hell, let's just walk out of this cave and see the sunrise,” you're in the cave for a reason. There is no door on that cave. You know that. But yet there are many obstacles. So you stay in that cave and you talk about the sunrise and you try to feel into it, but even after a while even those feelings are gone. There's numbness.
Then you try to make the cave better. You do a little painting on the walls. You sweep it out a little bit. You try to dig in a little deeper, make it a little more spacious in that cave. Then you wonder all the time why you're just losing that passion of life. Then you say, “Well, I'll never figure it out.” So you go back to digging and cleaning and sprucing up the cave a little bit more to the point you almost forget about the sunrise.
The sunrise is there. We're going to walk right out of that cave. We're going to walk into Jesus and your demons and your bad dreams and all the people who hurt you, and you're going to feel it. You're going to feel all the fear and all the terror and everything. It's going to bring up everything, and we're going to walk right through it, because it's going to be “and.” And. “And I'm going to see the sunrise. See all of you back in the cave. Hey, there's no door, by the way. There's no door.” Whewww! And they're all standing back in there, “No, he's crazy. She's crazy.” Nope, going to see the sunrise.
There are worlds around you right now, but when you live in that cave and when you're afraid to step out of it, afraid of being crazy, afraid of your phobias, afraid of your addictions, afraid of yourself, you can stand right at that doorway, that entrance to the cave; you can stand right there and not cross over.
I'm going to provoke you and annoy you and anything else I can, entertain you, whatever it takes to have you say, “It doesn't matter anymore. I don't care if I go crazy. I don't care if my body goes to hell. I don't care if I lose. I don't care, because it's all just one great big 'and.'” That's all it is. One great big “and.” Fears, phobias, joys, sensualities and it's enlightenment and stupidity. It's “and.” It's all of the above – living in a cave and living outside of it. That, my friends, is realization.
Let's take a huge deep breath. Ohh! Mmm, mm, mm. I can feel this is going somewhere. Hm. Good.
And now with the beautiful musical accomplishment, well, it's actually mostly music and a little talking. In this beauty, let's do a merabh or whatever we want to call it. Let's do a merabh.
Now, let's take a good deep breath and get prepared. Houselights down, and all of you watching in online, please join us for this merabh. You're here, as well. You're right here with us in Louisville, Colorado.
EDITH: Can I ask one little question?
ADAMUS: You want to break this beautiful moment by a question you already know the answer to?
ADAMUS: Go ahead. Microphone.
EDITH: Well, I wondered …
ADAMUS: Mike. We've got to have a microphone. Yes. And we'll need the houselights back up. We'll change everything back over here. Yes.
EDITH: What's the difference betw- …
ADAMUS: Would you mind standing?
EDITH: Not at all.
EDITH: What's the difference between “and” and an illusion?
ADAMUS: Ahh! That is a good question. “And” and an illusion; what is the difference? I ask you.
EDITH: I asked you first. (laughter)
ADAMUS: I asked you second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth seventh, eighth, ninth, tenth, all the way. I took up all the rest of the numbers. So …
ADAMUS: None. None. There is no truth, my friends, not like you would like to think there is. There's no singular truth, If there is a truth, it's “and.” It's all true. There is no difference between illusion and reality. It's just how much it hurts when you run into it.
ADAMUS: Well, that's very literal, because this is an illusion. It's an absolute illusion, this wall. But if you run into it – in this dimension if you run into it – it kind of hurts. But then you heal or whatever. But other illusions are not as physical, but they're no more or less an illusion. There is the singularity that says, “If it's solid, it's real. If it's not, it doesn't exist.” But, of course, my answer to that, especially from my writing days, what about love? It doesn't have mass. You cannot pour it into a glass, but yet it hurts more than running headfirst into a wall. Ah, yes. That's a lovely thought isn't it? (some laughter)
But what is real? What is an illusion? “And.” They're all real and they're all illusions. None of them are real, but none of them are false. It's the “and” proposition again. You're going to realize that this act of Edith is an illusion. It's an interesting act and there's so much more. It's not Edith become more; it's Edith and your other worlds. Yeah. Would you like to go there?
EDITH: I can't answer that.
ADAMUS: You can't answer that. That's better than saying, I don't know. (Adamus chuckles)
EDITH: So I don't have to go to the bathroom?
ADAMUS: I cannot … go to the bathroom. I'll take you to the bathroom.
ADAMUS: It's been a long time since I've taken a lady to the bathroom. (Adamus chuckles) I'll go if you go.
ADAMUS: I'll go if you go. You go first. I'll go second.
ADAMUS: Because you got to go. I don't want to embarrass you in front of everybody.
EDITH: I don't have to go to the bathroom. No, I don't want to go.
ADAMUS: Oh she doesn't want to go – now she doesn't have to go. “And.” It's like you're going, you're not going – and – all at the same time. Okay.
Now, can … Edith? Okay, let's bring the houselights down. (Adamus chuckles)
Okay, deep breath. Deep, deep breath.
And before the music starts, I want to ask you a question, and I turned the houselights down so you don't embarrass yourself or me. When's the last time you had a really, really good sensual experience? When? (someone says “Moments ago”; Adamus chuckles) The one in the back of the room without pants on says “Moments ago.” (laughter)
SART: Can it be in this lifetime?
ADAMUS: Yeah, in this lifetime. Let me get back to being kind of poignant here. Okay. Any other audience remarks? Anybody need to use the toilet or have, you know … okay.
Let's take a deep breath and get into the moment.
Sensual experience. Oh. You know, this kind of like a huge wave, kind of a huge overwhelming, in a way, kind of a huge breeze of sensual experience in your life. That kind of sensual experience that you can feel throughout your entire body. It quiets the mind and the mind feels like it's in harmony. That true swell of sensual experience. I would venture to say that either it's been quite a while or not often enough.
There is sometimes even a guilt about having this, because, well, you have to be configured. I like that word. You have to be configured. But a huge sensual experience that comes over you, and it could be sexual, yes. I guess one could ask, I could ask, when is the last time any of you had a really good physical orgasm?
GERHARD: Last night. (laughter from Adamus, some giggles in the audience)
ADAMUS: Okay, stop the music, turn up the lights and let's talk about this. (laughter) Kidding. Okay, and before that, my friend?
GERHARD: The night before. (more laughter)
ADAMUS: And before that?
GERHARD: I don't remember.
AADMAUS: She's smiling. She's smiling. Good. Good on you.
EINAT: This is weird. (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: Good on you.
Not often enough, I would say, whether it was last night or whenever, not often enough.
And to continue with that line of questioning, when's the last time you had a good mental orgasm? What, you're just finding out now you can have a mental orgasm? How come nobody told you about this? What? Yeah, mental orgasm. It's not when you put everything together and make sense out of everything. It's when it doesn't matter. That's a good mental sensual orgasm. Feeling so comfortable that you could say, “It doesn't matter. I don't need to keep configuring. I can let it go.”
Do you realize what a relief that is for your mind – your poor mind – when you say, “I don't have to figure all this out. I never will. It's not written into the agreement. It's not part of the contract. I don't have to figure it out.” And it's never going to be logical. It will never make sense, ever, ever.
The Masters have all discovered that. Oh, they worked so hard at – the philosophers, ey – trying to make sense out of the thing, and it doesn't. And when you can “and” that – and's going to become a verb here – when you can “and” that, it doesn't have to make sense. It doesn't even matter.
Then you start to get mind orgasms. Orgasm is a release, a release from configuration, a release from the norm. Sometimes it's so powerful, because things have been pent up inside. The release is huge; huge, to use Linda's word.
When's the last time you had an orgasm of the spirit? I like to watch your minds as you play with that one – “How does the spirit have an orgasm?” It's kind of like Spock. (Adamus chuckles) It's so internal that you can hardly tell, but something big is happening on the inside.
Orgasm of the spirit, the release, the unconfiguring of the spirit, releasing all that religious belief and even spiritual belief, because they are truly the constipation of spirit – religions and philosophies, beliefs.
When's the last time you had a spiritual orgasm? Maybe you had a few experiences along the way with some realizations, insights, some of those “ahh” moments, you know, but not enough.
It should be all the time; physical, mental, spiritual orgasm of the Body of Consciousness, meaning the complete releasing, opening, freeing, joy pouring out.
When's the last time you had one of those big sensual waves of just knowingness? Not mental, not trying to figure it out, but just allowing the knowingness, to the point where it nearly knocked you off your feet? Not often enough.
You deserve it.
When was the last time you had that overwhelming wave, that beautiful wave of wisdom – sensual wisdom – where it's a feeling and nothing more. Not words. Not “How smart am I,” but a wave of wisdom. The sensual feeling, “I Know that I Know. I don't know how the hell I know. It doesn't really matter. I don't even have to try to know.”
But, you know, these things, my dear friends, these things should be commonplace, all the time. Not once in a while, not a physical orgasm once every three years, not a wondering what a mental orgasm is or a spiritual orgasm; these should be all the time.
I know you can feel it. I know you desire it. Can you allow it?
It has nothing to do with, “Well, I'm too busy” or “I'm taking care of others.” No. Those are excuses. It's makyo. All excuses for not giving yourself something I think you deserve.
It's wisdom; it's not thinking.
It's allowing the sensual in your body, not confining it or limiting it.
It's a sensual wave of allowing, rather than restricting and judging.
A sensual wave of you. Sensual and essential.
When's the last time you had one of these overwhelming waves that came into your body, into your thoughts, into your dreams, into your heart?
This is what should be natural. This is what should be flowing. And this is what you can allow.
Sensuality is meaning awareness at every level. I talk about consciousness. The consciousness is awareness, but sensuality is when that awareness is, you could say, applied and experienced.
Sensuality … that's when consciousness is really experienced.
You can't make this sensual orgasm. You can't demand it, make it that it's here. You can allow it. You can't force yourself through thoughts to have it. But you can open up and allow it, receive it.
So let's do that right now.
We're not trying to configure sensuality here. Just allowing it.
Take a good deep breath.
As the music plays, free yourself.
Can you hear you communicating with you, without words? Just with that sensuality.
I told you before that in consciousness, where we're going, it's also about communicating. I told you that we're communicating – I'm talking to you, dear Linda of Eesa is talking, Gerhard, Einat communicating through the beautiful resonance of music – but can you hear that real communication? I'm not talking about from your head thoughts to you, but from You to you? Ah, that's sensual. That is very sensual.
Listen. Listen to that sensual expression taking place in you at every level, in the “and.”
Take a good deep breath.
How long has it been since you had that deeply, deeply personal wave of inner sensual experience in the body, in the mind, in the spirit, in the I Am? Probably too long.
When I asked you earlier what it's been like for the last two months of this year, I'd venture to say that probably maybe kind of like the last year or five years, in a way. Just not enough of that true sensuality, feeling, awareness in the intimate levels, creativity, wisdom, I Am-ness.
Let's take a good deep breath.
What a day it's been. What a day it's been. Very special thanks to Master G and to Einat.
So the question at the end of this day that you're probably asking, so I'll answer; you're probably saying, “What does it look like when Adamus makes love?” (Adamus turns around and hugs himself; laughter)
With that, my dear friends, remember all is well in all of creation.
Thank you. Blessings to all of you. (audience applause)
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