< Ascension 2 >
There is a lightworker by the name of Rachael. And this one that we call Rachael… it is not necessarily her real name, but she is a real person. She is also a composite of all of you. She represents parts and pieces of all of you. We tell the story of Rachael to help you to understand the lesson on this day.
Rachael, like you, came to Earth. She had lived a thousand and ten lifetimes on Earth before - not many, compared to some of you who like to keep coming back over and over. (audience laughter) She lived a thousand and ten lifetimes, and she chose this lifetime as her final clearing. She chose it, knowing there was the potential for the Earth to be terminated, either by the hand of man, or by what you would call the hand of God (planetary setup). But she also knew - for she had spoken at length with her guides and the angels on our side of the veil - she knew there was a strong potential that all this would be circumvented, that this potential for destruction would be transmuted into the potential of ascension, the potential of moving forward.
Either way, she came into this lifetime for the final clearing. And she was like many of you. She said, "This will be my last lifetime. I will not come back to Earth again." And we joke, and we laugh, when we sit here and see you who came back in ascension status (going to next lifetime without death)!
Now this one we call Rachael had a difficult childhood, for her mother had abandoned her at an early age. Her father tried to be loving, but he was overwhelmed by taking care of the four children. He could not find the time, between his work and trying to support them in a decent way, to nurture any of them, so they spent much time alone. They hardly knew what a babysitter was, for they could not afford one. While Rachael's father was busy at work, she would be at home helping to care for the others. But more important, she was setting up the opportunity to be within her self, to create her own games, to create her own fun, to create her own expressions.
There was very little guidance from her father. As a matter of fact, later in her teenage years, there was resentment, for the family was starting to come back together financially. They were now able to afford a middle class house in a middle class neighborhood in a middle class town. But now the father was treating himself to the things that he had missed. He was going out at night, and he had lady friends. He spent little time with his four children, and little time with Rachael. Indeed, there was much anger and resentment because of this.
As she grew into her later teens and into her early twenties, she would try to find the love that she had not received from her father in other men, but these relationships did not work out so well. None were able to fulfill something within her. There was something that had occurred when she was a child. There was an inner ringing that occurred. There was an inner voice that kept coming up. It needed to be fulfilled. It needed a partnership. In this portion of her life, Rachael looked for this partnership in her relationships with men.
Now, she was indeed one who was very bright, one that did go to college to become self-supporting. And when she graduated, because her relationships were so poor, she threw herself into business. She worked hard. She worked hard in large companies, moving her way up the ladder. But all of this time, there was something unfulfilled within her. As we said, she kept on trying to find this in relationships, but these would not last so long. She would tire of the men in her life quite quickly, for they did not fill the role she was looking for.
She became quite successful in business. In her early thirties, she opened her own business, and that took off as well, for there was a drive within her and a light within her. Yet there was this continual gnawing, a feeling, a sense that there needed to be something more, that there was something missing.
And one day a business associate of hers talked with her about this thing called Spirit. Oh, and immediately lightworker Rachael shunned this and said she did not so much care for the churches. Her father had sent her, and relatives and friends had taken her to their services and tried to convert her. They tried to have her enlist or enroll in their churches, and none of this interested her.
But now, after these discussions with her business associate about Spirit and about self, she became quite interested. She began to read books, like so many of you, and she began to go to meetings. She began to beam from within for the first time in a long, long time.
Along the way she did find a husband, if any of you were wondering. She did find a husband, and she did have several children, but part of the reason for doing this was that she felt she must. She felt that this was part of the program for humans. She felt it was important for the looks of her business to have this mate so that people did not think she was odd or different.
She got deeply involved in this spiritual work. The more she looked into it, the more she saw of herself, and the more she realized that those early years that she had spent by herself as a child… she realized there was so much more going on during that time. She realized that she was communing with Spirit. She was talking with the angels. She was feeling her guides. There was so much that was going on back then. She remembered this, as she studied more and more of these materials.
Yet she was frustrated, even with this New Age material. She was frustrated, for it felt good for a while, but still did not fill the desire she felt within. She still did not know how to speak to God. In spite of all the wonderful people she met, and all the wonderful words she heard, she still did not have that deep inner connection with Spirit. It was still an outside and elusive thing. It still had not clicked within.
She heard all these words about being the Creator, and to a large degree, she was beginning to understand in her intellect what this meant. She read the Creator Series, and she found value in it. Yet there was still something gnawing within lightworker Rachael. She wanted to feel. She wanted that connection with whatever it was. "What is it?" she would wonder at night. "Is it God in some far off place? Is it my former guides? Is it the angels?" She would not feel this. She would think it, but not feel it.
Dear Rachael was so very frustrated with the process and wanted this connection so deeply, and we on the other side sat and watched her and watched you. This brought tears to our eyes, because we understand at the deepest level that you are so pure in your intent. You are so pure in your desire. All you want to do is to be touched by Spirit and to be aware of Spirit’s love. We realize that. We realize, in listening to your prayers, that you are not asking for all sorts of worldly goods. You are not asking - most of you - to be thirty or forty years younger. You are not asking to have the brains of an Einstein. Your deepest, deepest prayer and wish and desire is simply to be touched by Spirit.