The Kharisma Series SHOUD 5
Presented to the Crimson Circle Dec 31, 2014
Original Website http://www.crimsoncircle.com/
Magical. Truly magical. The music, the moment, each and every one of you. Thank you, dear Yoham. More to come, so don't get too relaxed. Hmm.
Magical. Oh! Because … (a Shaumbra woman hands him a crystal mug filled with coffee) Oh, my dear! Oh, my dear!
SHAUMBRA 1: I boldly and outrageously present you with …
ADAMUS: A cup worthy …
SANDRA: … crystal cup.
ADAMUS: … of a Master.
SANDRA: Coffee with cream.
ADAMUS: Yes. Ahh! Thank you. (audience applause) And no cheap paper or plastic cups for a Master. No. No. Crystal … real crystal.
EDITH: Is that the one from Leslie? (Adamus shrugs; someone says “No”)
ADAMUS: Magical, dear Shaumbra, because while that music was playing, it was all downloaded. It was actually downloaded days – maybe for some of you, weeks – ago. But you got to listen to the music. You got to feel it. Ah, you got to hear the music.
Whatever hadn't been fully downloaded before came through now. That's the beauty of life. You actually don't have to go through the drudgery, the dreariness, the boredom of everyday daily experience to unravel things in the linear. It comes in just like that. Everything that we're going to talk about in the Shoud today, already done with and through the music, while the music was playing in that relaxing moment when you forgot about your broken arm, my dear. Ah, may it heal quickly and no other parts of you break for a while. (some chuckles)
SHEEMA: Gee, thanks.
ADAMUS: (chuckling) Yeah, “Gee, thanks.” (more chuckles) That was enthusiastic.
Magical in that beautiful moment, everything is there. Everything. Everything about this Shoud, every bit of wisdom, everything you're going to get – already there. That's the beauty of your everyday life. It's already there. It's already been downloaded or in the process of being downloaded; 'downloaded' meaning coming in to your awareness.
You realize there's really nothing to strive for, nothing to fight for, nothing to aspire to in the old way of aspirations. It's that easy.
Now, the beauty is that you got to listen to the music then. Everything coming in, being downloaded … (Adamus takes a sip of his coffee) Oh, so good. You can throw that away (to Linda), whatever that swill is that Cauldre's drinking.
It's all been downloaded, but the beauty is now you got to experience the music, and now you can experience it in a little different way: more joyfully, more openly, not trying to get anything out of it, but just receiving what's already there. That is going to be the life going forward, where you can be in that knowingness that it's already there, and then experience it in a much more joyful way.
I know some of you have had the experience where you try to listen so deeply to music or a lecture or toning or playing of crystal bowls trying to get something from it, afraid that you might miss something. You're not going to, because it's already there. So beautiful, so simple, so clean.
Now you get to have, what you would call, an emotional response while you're listening to the music now at ease, because you're not trying to get anything from it, not trying to make it into something, not trying to have it heal you or cure you. Now you can just enjoy it, and you can have, what you would call, an emotional or a sensual response to it. You can sit back and relax and really enjoy it.
That emotional response, which so many of you, by the way, are in such conflict with – one minute trying to have an emotional response and the next minute not trying to have an emotional response; one moment trying to feel something, the next moment trying to shut it off because you're feeling too much – it suddenly changes. The emotional and the sensual response now is just a flavoring – your flavoring.
The flavoring. It's a beautiful extract that you put into the ingredients of your life. It's a flavoring now that gives that special unique taste – your taste to your life. Ah! Now you can add that ingredient of even emotion and especially of sensuality to everything you're doing, at ease knowing it's already there.
Now, some of you are thinking about it a little too much – “Now how does that happen?” Well, I can tell you. It's the natural way things happen. It's the natural way it should happen. You shouldn't have to work so hard and fight so hard.
It's already there. Whether it's a job, whether it's an insight or a realization, whether it's anything, it's already there. We'll come back to that by the end of our Shoud, but realize that the end is already here.
Farewell to the Old
It's been an interesting year. We started out the year … (there is some microphone distortion) such a big voice today. We started out the year by basically dismissing everyone, by basically saying it's time to walk out, to leave. As you remember back up the hill, I asked everybody to leave. I asked those of you watching in online to even leave your own room, your own house.
It was a symbolic act of saying, “I'm either going to be committed, stay committed to my enlightenment or I'm going to go back into the old world, the old ways.” No judgment. It doesn't really matter. But it was a very symbolic act of saying are you ready? Are you really ready?
Almost all of you came back. A few didn't, but almost all of you came back. But still wondering what this is all about, where we're going, what's going to happen to you?
Here we are. No coincidence that we're having this very special Shoud still in this year. Oh, it's approaching the waning hours, but still in this year. How perfect it is that we're not doing it into the New Year. It's like our bookends – at the beginning of the year saying, “Please leave if you're not ready,” then spending truly the whole year really feeling into it, really allowing it, “Are you ready?” – and here we come into these final, final hours and that final, final decision. A decision that actually each and every one of you has already made.
So let's use this occasion right now, perhaps with a few scary fearful feelings, but let's use this occasion for that true farewell to the old limited self, the fearful self, the linear human self, the self who had to identify with a past, the self who wondered what was going to happen in the future. Let's use this opportunity for a true farewell to being lost, to being confused, to wondering what was going to happen. Let's use this as an opportunity to say farewell to doubt. Oh, doubt, such an ugly smelly blanket, but you still carry it around. Why? Why? You ask yourself why. I ask you why. Why? Why would you want to carry around that really grotesque old blanket of doubt? But it gives you a certain degree of comfort.
I think there is an odd comfort in it. You think that if you don't doubt yourself, that you're going to do something, you're going to act in a way that you shouldn't act. So you put that limitation. That doubt is kind of like your breaking system. You've got to doubt yourself, got to throw that doubt in there just to make sure. But let's use this also as a time to say farewell to the doubt.
I'll put it in very human terms, very linear terms. What do you have to lose? If you let go of doubt, if you don't get caught up in doubt, rather, you don't get caught up in doubt, what's the worst that's going to happen – that you're going to do something bizarre like becoming a Master? If you let go of doubt that you're going to, hmmm, let your light shine? That you're going to have charisma? That you're going to let the true you come out?
The doubt is like a prison. The doubt is a limitation, and actually so many of you have gotten so used to doubt, this demon, this ghost; you've gotten so used to it that you just accept that it's there and it's going to keep coming back, that you're always going to be fighting that doubt.
You can let it go right now. You're going to let go of giving it any sort of credibility, any sort of energy. You're going to let go of that doubt.
Doubt is such an energy drainer, as you doubters know. (Adamus chuckles) Doubting yourself, such an energy drainer. It saps you of energy. Doubt is one of the relatives of [the sexual energy] virus. When doubt gets into your mind it kind of freezes up your mind, and then it penetrates deeper and deeper. That doubt gets uglier and uglier, and what happens is you don't do anything because you're doubting yourself. You don't even do … you don't do anything. You get frozen. You get stuck. It's not worth it.
So what a year it's been of saying, “Are you really ready for embodied enlightenment? Are you really, really ready for it?” You had a full year to consider it, to think in about it, to feel into it.
There were times during the years where you could feel your passion for it so deeply. You knew it was so real one day and the next day, doubt. The next day, “What am I doing?” The next day, still comparing yourself to other people. The next day, still thinking about where you've come from, your past and all the stupid things you've done and on and on. This doubt gets in your way. Uh-uh.
After a while, my friends, that gets to be such a bizarre way of living – between the passion for your realization and then all the doubt. Let's say farewell to all of that in these last few hours – well, some of you on the other side of the world, you're already into the new year, but just come back over here a minute to this side of the calendar. Let's use this time to say farewell to that.
I'm going to ask for some music accompaniment by my favorite music group in the whole world, Yoham, and let's take the opportunity while the gentle music plays to say farewell.
Saying farewell – one moment it sounds really good – “Good! I'm glad to get rid of all this” – but then the doubt comes in. It's like, “Haahhhh! But what am I doing? Can I really say farewell?” You see how the doubt works? “Can I really say farewell? Or is this just a nice little five-minute musical experience, nice little feel-good, but tomorrow back in the same place?” It's totally up to you; totally up to you. You can say farewell to all of that old self.
Say farewell to the doubt, the consternation. Oh! Sometimes … I love you so dearly, all of you, but sometimes I look into your lives. I look into what you put yourself through. The struggle. The mental torment. The questioning of who you are. And I do scream out at you at times and say, “Just let go.”
You get a big smile on your face, but then the next minute, you're like, “Oh, but can I let go of everything?” and “Am I worthy to really let go? What do I need to do to let go? Do I need to do some sort of water therapy to let go?” No, shut up. (a few chuckles) Just let go. It's that easy. It really is.
So let's use this occasion with the music to let go. Farewell. Farewell to that old self. Not that there was anything wrong with it, other than your perspective. Your perspective. The old self is fine, but you had a perspective of it and a fight with it. Oh, that fight with the old self. One day you'd win the round; the next day it would win the round. But it didn't end at nine rounds. It kept going day after day after day. Let's say farewell to your perspective of the past, to your fight with yourself.
Take a good deep breath. It's truly as easy as allowing.
To those of you who need a little mental justification, please understand that that old self is no happier with you than you are with it. In other words, that perception of the old self, it wants to get out of that trap as well. It doesn't like that role. It doesn't like the loathing that you have for it and the fear that you have for it and the disdain and all the rest of that. It's tired of the game.
You see, that old self is not what you think it was. It wants to reveal itself – your self – in its fullness, in its richness. It doesn't want to be held in some sort of consciousness of limitation that you've held it in. It doesn't want to fight you anymore. You put it in the position where it's had to. You've made it fight you.
You could say the old self is the accumulation of a lot of experiences, of failures – at least in your perspective – failures, betrayals by yourself and others, struggles, the old self with a lot of sadness. I'm not saying it was all rough, but a lot of it was.
It was tired of the position you put yourself in, you put your past in. And in one very beautiful simple experience here, sometimes known as a merabh, you can just let that go.
I'll put it to you a different way. The consciousness you have of your past is very limited. The degree of consciousness that you hold in your past is very confined.
Consciousness is, let's say, a light, a charisma that shines in brilliance, unobstructed, unabashed, even undefined. Consciousness – this beautiful crystal light.
But what consciousness you have of your past, whether it's a past life, whether it's anything in this lifetime, consciousness is generally placed in things like failure and struggle, hardship, suffering, traumas.
The consciousness that you have of your past is not truth. Not the real truth. But you put these little particles of consciousness at the most difficult, depressing and dark points of your past. And there they sit, these little particles of limited consciousness, and then they're separated from the main consciousness, which would be your divine, your Free Self. It's still consciousness, but then it starts coming back to you in limited thought and memory.
It's still consciousness of your past, but now it comes back to you in a very perverse way – bad memories, stuck energy, ghosts, doubts and darkness.
Your past, it doesn't want that. It really doesn't. It doesn't want that limitation. It wants full consciousness, the full light … unlimited.
I'll say it over and over and over again until the popcorn starts popping, but your past is not what you think it is, thank god. Your past is not what you remember it as.
There are those who will fight for their past. There are those who solidify their stories of their past, but stories that simply are not true. There are those who tell these stories over and over to themselves and to others, and they simply aren't true.
The past, it deserves as much consciousness as the present. It deserves as much charisma as the future.
Let's say farewell to the perspective – the old perspective – of the past.
And it's fine here to have an emotional or a sensual response. It's fine to feel what that was like – having limited particles of consciousness that were embedded in the past.
It's fine feeling what I would call the dryness, the dullness and the angst of the past.
Through the music, I'm going to take a moment and convey to you; I'm going to channel through the music here. I'm going to channel what it's like when you let go of the limitations of the past, all of your experiences, all of your lifetimes even, and let it be free. Let it have that full charisma that it so deserves. Let yourself be free of whatever limits you put on.
Through the music I'm going to channel here what I see in the real past that you've had. Not what you see, not how you've limited yourself, not how you've made yourself suffer.
Through the music I'd like to channel into each and every one of you the beauty, the sheer beauty of releasing the limitations of the past.
Let's take a deep breath, as we go deeply into this.
(long pause, as music plays)
You see the past is not at all what you remember. It's not. I'll continue to say that again and again until you get it. But it's not. That past, that thing that really defines your present and your future is not what you thought it was.
Let's take a deep breath and say farewell to the old perceptions of the past.
It's a tough thing for a human to do, because the past defines them, or so they think. The past gives them something to think about and compare to, compare everything else to. But it's one of the greatest limitations, because the past is not – not at all – what you think.
Now, the mind will argue that, and it will doubt that. It'll say, “No, I remember. I had a job from this date to that date. I got married at this certain time and I've done this and that.” Those are timeline incidences, but it's not really the past. The past is really the wisdom that was gained or, in many cases, not gained. It has nothing to do with what specific thing happened on a certain date on the calendar. It was the way you perceived it. It was the way that you had emotions and feelings and understandings to it.
What happens is an incident happens and the feelings are many. The mind quickly limits them and the mind puts them in a nice little storage box and says, “This is the way it was, emotionally and in every other way,” and then it keeps referring to all that. But it's not true.
It's a huge step to say, “I'm going to say farewell to the past.” A huge step, because in a way there's a feeling like it's denial. Denial. And I've been accused of that many times – telling people to be in denial. Not at all. The real denial is when you have limited particles of consciousness embedded in past events. That's the denial.
The denial is not accepting and allowing that there was a plethora of experiences and feelings and reactions, a range of them. You can have an experience and it can range from being bad to good all together, layer after layer of experience of the very same thing that happened. But the mind will limit it and say, “No, this happened and it was bad.” Then you spend years and years trying to get over it, but in that years and years of therapy or whatever you do to get over it, you're only giving it more definition and more credibility. And then it sets in deeper and gets more solid, and then you really believe that's the past.
In order to experience and to be the Free Self, you must free your past also. It's not a mental exercise. We're not going to sit here for hours and hours and go through untying the knots of our past, because that, again, is a very mental and very ineffective exercise. But it's as simple as sitting here for a few minutes with the beautiful music and feeling what it's like to release the limitations of your past, to feel the liberation of coming out of those tight definitions of what happened. It frees you. It goes back to one of the most brilliant teachings of Tobias – the future is the past healed.
So, my dear friends, let's take a good deep breath with that.
Speaking of Tobias, the Masters are here today, a very special gathering. We have all of those who have worked with you in the past, ranging from Tobias, to Metatron, to Kuthumi, to St. Germain – my personal favorite – to all the others, because this is a turning point. This is, what you would say, a moment of truth right here. It's a moment of truth because we're leaving behind not just the old year; we're leaving behind a limited unremembered past. I say unremembered, because you're not remembering what really happened. We're leaving that behind.
As we go forward now into the new year, into the new times, much as Cauldre and Linda talked about today, it's going to be only for those who are choosing and allowing embodied enlightenment. That's it. That's it. No room for anything else. No room in the work myself and the other Masters are going to do with you, no room for doubt. I'm sorry. And that's where you and I are going to arm wrestle. You and I are going to arm wrestle this year, because you're going to say, you're going to tell me, “I can't get rid of the doubt.” You're going to say, “I have to maintain a certain amount of doubt as a balance.” You use it as a balance to make sure that you're doing the right thing. You're going to tell me that the doubt isn't anything that you can do anything about, and I'm going to put it right back in your face. Right back.
There's no reason for the doubt. No need for the doubt.
You must be tired of it because I'm really tired of it. (some chuckles)
Let's take a good deep breath and say farewell to that old limited perspective. Free yourself. It's not a mental exercise. You just do it. You just do it.
Adamus Question & Answer
So Shaumbra, let's have a little fun. Linda with the microphone please, my favorite time.
ADAMUS: My favorite time. It's question and answer time – my questions, your answer.
LINDA: Your pleasure.
ADAMUS: Now before we do, two things. Let's take a breath, a good – let's call it – an energy shift breath. Let's shift into that. (everyone takes a deep breath)
And, to really understand the wisdom of what happens here when I ask these inane questions and you give me really inane answers, let's shift into what's really happening in the room.
Well, for one, it's a distraction. I love distractions. Number two, it gets you into feelings and I love when you get into your confusion. (some chuckles) No, I really do, because it proves a good point. I ask a question and you start to have feelings. As I watch you, you'll have two, three, four different feelings, and then you get confused – “Why should I have all these different feelings, some that might seem contradictory” – and then you either shut down or you pick one and think that's the only one. No. They're all true, every answer that you have within yourself.
When I ask these questions, you go through – shwttt! – I can see it, getting very mental, and you're thinking what happens if Linda hands you the microphone? “What answer am I going to give that will really impress all of yours?” (a few chuckles) And you forget about yourself. You forget about yourself, and you forget that there are actually layers of answers, and they're all true. They're all true.
But before we do this, I want to do one other thing. Let's take a good deep breath – and I'll keep saying this over and over until the corn starts popping – everything, everything is about your enlightenment. Everything that happens, even that yawn that you're doing right now is about your enlightenment. (Adamus chuckles)
Everything is about your enlightenment. That's the beautiful thing. Every action, everything that happens with other people, your whole life, bar nothing, is about enlightenment.
Now, the funny thing is with the experience we just had, even your past is now about your enlightenment. You maybe thought, “Well, before it wasn't, because it was my past and I wasn't very enlightened back then,” but now it suddenly is. So suddenly, it all starts working together. It creates quite a swirl, quite a storm, quite a cleansing as this happens. But everything, even the broken arm, is about your enlightenment. Not that you had to break your arm to get enlightened, but it's got to be about your enlightenment, otherwise it wouldn't be there. Right?
ADAMUS: What have you learned from this experience of breaking the arm? What have you learned?
SHEEMA: Ummm …
ADAMUS: That's bullshit. You should have learned don't walk on ice! Don't walk on ice! (some chuckles) Okay!
SHEEMA: (chuckling) Okay!
ADAMUS: What else have you learned? (she's still chuckling) She was going to give me a very metaphysical answer. Eh, no. Don't walk on ice. What else have you learned?
SHEEMA: (chuckling) To be vulnerable.
SHEEMA: Because I'm so used to being independent …
ADAMUS: Oh yeah, yeah.
SHEEMA: … and strong and not counting on anybody.
SHEEMA: But now there's a lot of things I can't do.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Like?
SHEEMA: So I have to allow others to help me.
ADAMUS: What can't you do?
SHEEMA: Oh, grabbing things, like little things.
ADAMUS: You could grab me with the other hand. It doesn't have to be just that. (she chuckles) Good. What else? Vulnerable. That's okay.
SHEEMA: Allowing others to serve me.
ADAMUS: Ahh! I love that. Allowing others to serve you.
ADAMUS: You could actually kind of play it up with the arm thing. You know, just … you could actually put both arms in one of those and really play it up! (she chuckles) If I were you I'd get a wheelchair too and just … (she laughs loudly) I mean, come on! If that's what it takes to make you realize that only a Master can be in service. Everyone else is but a servant. And only a Master can really allow others to serve them. Yeah, play it up. Do we need to go so far as to break anything else to make the point?
SHEEMA: No. No.
ADAMUS: Good, good, good.
SHEEMA: No. But …
ADAMUS: So that wasn't a sign from God that you're doing something wrong in your life?
SHEEMA: Well, it's kind of interesting. Last Shoud you were talking about some guy that fell off a ladder.
ADAMUS: Yes, yes.
SHEEMA: You remember that?
ADAMUS: I did. Yeah.
SHEEMA: All right.
ADAMUS: Yeah. I didn't mean it literally! (laughter) Let me put it a different way. It was based on a true story of something that already happened. But do you realize how many Shaumbra got hurt since that story? It's really sad. A lot. You're not the only one.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Yeah. Did you relate to the story?
SHEEMA: Well, the minute I fell, the instant, I wondered 'What am I thinking?'
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah. What were you thinking when you fell?
SHEEMA: Well, I was thinking that once I got down I was going to go over there and smoke a cigarette.
ADAMUS: Ah! Ah! (she chuckles) Now we get to the real issue. So how do you feel … do you have guilt about smoking cigarettes?
SHEEMA: Well, I didn't smoke for a few days, and then I started smoking again.
SHEEMA: So how do I deal with this?
ADAMUS: Smoking, the broken arm, or me?
SHEEMA: Smoking. (they both laugh)
ADAMUS: Funny you should mention that. We're going to get to that in just a moment.
ADAMUS: Yes. As a matter of fact, we'll start it right now. Here's my question of the day, but you can give the microphone to Linda, because I want a little feeling on this one first. Tough question to end this year. Tough question. And you never know who is going to get Linda's mysterious microphone, so be ready. Hmm-hmm.
The question that I have today, and you might be included too, yes. (to Yoham) Just because you're musicians doesn't mean you're exempt. And you over there, just because you're near the door doesn't mean you can run. The question is, and I really want you to feel into this first, realizing Linda might give you the microphone.
The question is: What have you been fighting within yourself? What have you been … hmm. Yeah, a lot of “Hmm.” You can close your eyes. Just take a moment. What … and no makyo here, because I kind of already know.
What have you been fighting within yourself?
What have you been fighting within yourself?
Remember, any answer that you give may be helpful to other Shaumbra who are listening in now or in the future. And remember, any answer that you give might truly incriminate yourself. (Adamus chuckles)
What have you been fighting within yourself? Hmmm.
Are you ready, Linda?
ADAMUS: Let's begin.
ADAMUS: Ah! I love this time. You can feel the nervousness come over the room, and a few of you, yeah, “Give me the microphone!” But, yes. Would you mind standing so the whole world can see you?
LINDA F.: Rage.
ADAMUS: Rage. Excellent. Thank you. Thank you for your non-makyo answer. But you know my next question.
LINDA F.: Oh.
ADAMUS: Eh. (Adamus chuckles) Why the rage? What are you fighting?
LINDA F.: I guess I'm fighting a living situation with someone, and I'm not …
ADAMUS: Let's just stop at “I'm fighting a living situation.”
LINDA F.: Okay. Yes.
LINDA F.: Period.
ADAMUS: Nothing to do really with anybody else ultimately.
LINDA F.: Okay.
ADAMUS: A living situation. Interesting. Okay. Based on that, now, why the rage?
LINDA F.: (pausing slightly and then sighing) I guess I keep having hope that it's going to switch around. I mean, I moved into another living situation, but now I'm between two places.
ADAMUS: Mm hmm.
LINDA F.: Umm …
ADAMUS: Rage. Directed at yourself, I assume. But you will happily direct it at others if given the opportunity.
LINDA F.: That's what I'm finding out the last two days, yes. (some chuckles)
ADAMUS: Yeah. Good. Good. And what is that rage really about?
LINDA F.: It's about where I'm not using my resources totally for what I want for myself.
ADAMUS: Could I state it in a slightly different way?
LINDA F.: Sure.
ADAMUS: It's about your doubt or your questioning of freedom, independence, true independence. It's a little scary. You know, it's kind of easier kind of hanging on to some old situation, other situations. It's easier deferring to other people or saying it's about living accommodations, housing, that type of thing, but ultimately really about your own freedom – freedom from others, to begin with, which is kind of unusual for you and many others – but real freedom and what happens in that freedom. Are you ready for it? Can you handle the responsibility? Will you survive?
There is an – and I'm not trying to give you a hard time, but everybody can see themselves in it – there is some, what I'm going to call, survival energy feeding that goes on a lot of times when you think, “Well, at least there's another person in my life, even though I can't stand them, don't want to be with them. At least there is somebody or something else.” So you use it for an energy feeding from them. And it's not what I would say a vampire thing, but it's a comfort. It's a comfort.
It's a very scary thing for the human identity to contemplate being totally by themselves, a very scary thing. So there is that need for others, a need to see yourself through others, a need like they have an answer or may have an answer that you don't have. And also in your case very specifically the concern about will you just leave the planet? Will you just float out of here if there weren't other people in your life grounding you? Not even that they need you, but in a way you need them, because without anyone, without that old connection, there's a concern that you're just going to leave. So it's a survival energy feeding. And we'll get to the resolution – potential resolution – in just a moment.
Good. Next. Dear Linda of Eesa, who is next? What are you fighting in your life?
Oh, and before you hand the microphone to anyone, there's a lot of fighting going on. There really is. And I know some of you think, “Well, I have it under control.” (Spit!) (some chuckles) You only think you have it under control, but it's so rampant. It's so pervasive, and we just … we're just tired of it. We just need to let go of that. It's meaningless. It really is.
Okay, microphone, Linda. Yes.
SHAUMBRA 2 (man): Uhh, I guess …
ADAMUS: Would you like a cup of coffee?
SHAUMBRA 2: Sure.
ADAMUS: They're making a good cup today. Cream, sugar, goat's milk?
SHAUMBRA 2: In a crystal glass? Can I get one of those?
ADAMUS: In a crystal glass? They're get you something that looks kind of like a crystal glass. What would you like in it?
SHAUMBRA 2: Just cream, please.
ADAMUS: Just cream. Would you like some cookies?
SHAUMBRA 2: No, I'm not a big sweets guy.
ADAMUS: I would like some cookies.
SHAUMBRA 2: All right. (laughter)
ADAMUS: So …
SHAUMBRA 2: Please, Adamus wants some cookies.
ADAMUS: Yeah, a plateful up here. Good. So what are you fighting in your life?
SHAUMBRA 2: Uhh …
ADAMUS: By the way, what did I just do?
SHAUMBRA 2: Distracted me.
SHAUMBRA 2: Tried to get me out of my head so I don't give you a logical answer.
ADAMUS: Yes, yes, yes, yes. Good.
SHAUMBRA 2: Thank you.
ADAMUS: And what did I just do by asking you what I just did?
SHAUMBRA 2: Made me realize it?
ADAMUS: Yeah, or got you right back into your mind, but it's a little game we play. Go ahead. What are you fighting within yourself?
SHAUMBRA 2: I guess like a lot of fear and doubts. I feel I kind of put myself out there sometimes, but then I just end up taking two steps right back and …
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah. Why?
SHAUMBRA 2: I guess I'm a little afraid to kind of come out completely to the world and just be myself completely.
SHAUMBRA 2: I'm afraid of what might happen.
ADAMUS: Like what? Getting burned at the stake? (Adamus chuckles)
SHAUMBRA 2: Yeah, well, that might've happened in one lifetime.
ADAMUS: It only hurts for about a minute. (laughter) No, because in a way you've already left before the process. That's the good thing about being timeless, you know, if they're going to burn you at the stake. You're already gone, in a way. You just hang around enough to go, “Jesus! That was really hot!” and then shwtttt! You're out of there. So you never really go through … (someone hands him a cup of coffee) Have a sip. Yes. Oh, you got a fleur-de-lis mug. I didn't …
SHAUMBRA 2: Yeah.
ADAMUS: Wow! (laughter)
SHAUMBRA 2: Thanks.
ADAMUS: Wow! Okay. Okay.
So here you are, obviously an intelligent man. Here you are, a good looking guy. Wouldn't you say, ladies and gentlemen? (audience agrees) Yeah, see? See what happens when you come here.
You're insightful. You have consciousness. So what gives with this doubt and fear? And you've got all the tools sitting right there for you, why do you have this? Why are you fighting it and who's winning?
SHAUMBRA 2: Not my true Self.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Yeah. Do you enjoy it?
SHAUMBRA 2: No. It's getting really tiring actually.
ADAMUS: You lay awake at night in bed?
SHAUMBRA 2: Yeah. Insomnia. Just …
ADAMUS: What – being a bright guy that you are – what solutions have you come up with?
SHAUMBRA 2: Well, they're not working anymore. I mean, trying to distract myself with any number of different means. But I'm really discovering that it's just not working anymore.
ADAMUS: Good. (someone brings the plate of cookies) Cookies anyone? Cookies? Eh, me first. That's the way Masters work. Thank you. Pass them around. When the plate is empty, we'll just make some more fish and loaves and keep serving. (some chuckles) I'm sorry for the interruption.
SHAUMBRA 2: No worries.
ADAMUS: But, mmm. Mmm. Mmm. (Adamus is passionately enjoying the cookie; some laughter) Bear with me, I want to experience this. There are things I miss about being a human. Yeah, the cookies. It's almost … it's sensual. It's very sensual. Mm hmm.
AMIR: Mmm. (he's having a cookie too) To swallow… sugar.
ADAMUS: Mm hmm. Sugar doesn't bother me.
ADAMUS: I could eat a lot of sugar. Yeah. It only bothers those who are worried about sugar. And they think it affects them and then they have to, you know, go off of sugar and go on these other non-sugar diets. But a true Master can eat sugar for breakfast, just a bowl of sugar, (laughter) sometimes with a little cream on it. (more chuckles) Sweet cream sugar breakfast. (more laughter)
Where were we? (laughter)
SHAUMBRA 2: Oh, going back to the distractions again.
ADAMUS: Oh, it's back to the distraction thing. (more laughter) Actually, that one was more to make a point about sensuality. If you're going to eat a cookie, I mean eat it. Feel it. Stop what you're doing. Even if you're right in the middle of an interview, you know, with people watching in from around the world, just stop and have that sensual experience that most of you don't have anymore, and eat some sugar for breakfast. Good god.
So doubt and fear and … (someone brings more cookies) Oh thank you. Thank you.
EDITH: Give him one.
ADAMUS: He doesn't eat sugar.
ADAMUS: Not so much into sweets. Yeah.
SHAUMBRA 2: Not big. I do like pure chocolate, like high-percentage cacao. That's my stuff right there.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Well, this is pure. Then it's wrapped in a cracker inside of a cookie.
SHAUMBRA 2: Yeah!
ADAMUS: Very pure. Eh, mmm.
SHAUMBRA 2: Corn syrup. Yeah.
ADAMUS: Mm hmm. Mmm. Mmm.
So where were we? So we're on fear and doubt. You've got a lot going for you, but you get all wrapped up in it. How are you going to deal with this eventually?
SHAUMBRA 2: I find myself actually taking strides, finally, because I'm just so tired of the way that things have been. I mean, I'm starting to do things that I really enjoy and …
ADAMUS: Wow, what a concept. (some chuckles) Wow.
SHAUMBRA 2: … things that I was afraid to do like I'm really into spirituality obviously, and I have a blog and I'm been … (a cellphone rings)
ADAMUS: Yeah. Another little distraction. And you wouldn't even think that it would come from Edith's cell phone during the middle of our talk. The last person in the world you expect would be Edith! (laughter)
SHAUMBRA 2: Yes.
ADAMUS: Sweet mother Edith and her ringing cellphone. After all these years you would think that … how could … right in the middle of our conversation. (some chuckles) Yeah. (someone says “Hide it, hide it!”)
You notice all these distractions?
SHAUMBRA 2: Yeah. You're pretty good at them.
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah. (Adamus chuckles) Actually, you guys are good at it. You're really good at it, because this is exactly what you do. You've got these fights going on. You don't know how to handle it. You distract yourself until the fight comes back, until you create another fight. And pretty soon there's so much chaos and garbage going on that you've even forgot about what the fight was about, what you're fighting, and you forgot that there's actually a very easy solution to go beyond it.
So you stay in that boxing ring the whole time – I mean, maybe jumping from one boxing ring to the other – but pretty soon it gets so confusing. It's like, “I don't even know what I'm unhappy about anymore. I don't even know why I'm pissed off today. I don't even know why Adamus annoys me so much, but it's just the way things are,” kind of. Right?
SHAUMBRA 2: I suppose.
ADAMUS: I suppose. Okay. Good. Thank you. We'll come back.
SHAUMBRA 2: All right.
ADAMUS: We'll wrap this all up brilliantly.
What are you fighting? (Linda offers the microphone to John Kuderka who waves it away)
LINDA: Nope. You have to.
JOHN: No, I don't.
LINDA: Yes, you do. I was told you have to.
ADAMUS: Maybe we should have some more cookies. (laughter)
JOHN: Oh, I could use a cup of coffee too.
LINDA: Sandra, a cup of coffee for John.
JOHN: No. I'm just kidding.
ADAMUS: What are you fighting?
JOHN: (pausing) Health issues.
ADAMUS: Health issues. Good. That's a good one. How is that fight going?
JOHN: It seems to be going well at the moment.
ADAMUS: Okay. You fear that it may not go well? Fear that you don't have control over it?
JOHN: (pausing slightly) No, not fear. I've got control over it if I want to.
ADAMUS: Okay. No fear, no fight?
JOHN: Not really. No.
ADAMUS: Okay. The health issue, where is it originating from, why is it there in the first place?
JOHN: (exhaling deeply) Let's see.
ADAMUS: I'll be happy to help you out at any point.
JOHN: Well, go ahead.
ADAMUS: Okay. Health issue. You could trace it back to certain chemicals, toxins, things like that, but that's actually not the full story. It's an interesting story, but the health issue actually is going to help you become a much more sensitive, feeling person. It's given you the ability to feel into potential death. It's given you the ability to feel into yourself, your journey, the people around you, and suddenly it's activating, it's opening up real feelings; not emotions, which you are relatively adverse to, for good reason, but real feelings. And I would have to say that it's one of the three main things that you came here to experience in this lifetime, real – sensuality, I call it – but real feeling, and not the junky syrupy kind of feelings that you don't like so much in other people and I don't either, but real experience. And it's giving you that.
And now, if you take that essence of real feeling and really embody that, that whole need for any sort of biological imbalance, any sort of illness can go away. It's served its purpose. So embrace the feeling.
JOHN: Sounds good to me.
ADAMUS: Good. It's much easier, much better than the fight.
I know others of you here have had health issues and some scary health issues, I mean life threatening health issues. And they tell you these days, you know, “We're going to fight this. We're going to fight the cancer. We're going to fight whatever it is.” And I'm going to tell you right now, no. We're not. There is a much more efficient, a much better and a much more joyful way.
Okay, a few more. What are you fighting within yourself? What are you fighting? Yes.
SHAUMBRA 3 (woman): Fear
ADAMUS: Would you like cookies?
SHAUMBRA 3: I just had two cookies.
ADAMUS: Would you like more?
SHAUMBRA 3: No.
ADAMUS: Would you like a tuna fish sandwich right now? (laughter) I have a hunger for one.
SHAUMBRA 3: How did you know that's my favorite sandwich?
ADAMUS: How did I know! (she chuckles) Because the minute you stood up, I got a hunger for a …
SHAUMBRA 3: For tuna?
ADAMUS: … tuna fish sandwich.
SHAUMBRA 3: Oh.
ADAMUS: And I was always a salmon guy, but suddenly … tuna fish with a little bit of lettuce, extra mayo, some cheese …
SHAUMBRA 3: Potato chips.
LINDA: Dream on! (she laughs)
ADAMUS: And chips and on a nice grain bread, toasted.
LINDA: Is there tuna in the house?
ADAMUS: Toasted. The bread toasted slightly. Yes.
SHAUMBRA 3: I just had one yesterday.
ADAMUS: Ohhh! I …
SHAUMBRA 3: It's still in my aura, I guess.
ADAMUS: Let me … let me just smell a little bit. (laughter, as Adamus sniffs her) Ohhh! If only they made a tuna perfume. (lots of laughter)
But no, truly, I would love a tuna sandwich.
SHAUMBRA 3: Very good.
ADAMUS: Do you think I'm going to get one?
LINDA: Salmon. We can do salmon.
ADAMUS: Tuna! Tuna. But no, that's all right. So, enough of the distraction, let's get right to the point. What are you fighting?
SHAUMBRA 3: Fear.
ADAMUS: Yeah, of what?
SHAUMBRA 3: Whoa.
ADAMUS: Whoa. Could you feel that? Could you feel that “Whoa?” Could you empathize with it? When she said “Whoa” you were like, “Ohh! I know where you're coming from baby! I, I … whoa!” You say fear. Fear of what? Whoa! (a few chuckles) Okay.
SHAUMBRA 3: Uncertainty of the future. Doubt. Doubt would be a big part of that.
ADAMUS: Future is an absolute disaster. (some chuckles, she sighs) And the future is very promising. The future could be very profitable. The future is very easy. It will be all of those things. You understand? There is not one answer, but there are a lot of choices.
The future is going to be all those things. For some people the future will be absolutely dreadful. It's going to be the worst year they ever had.
SHAUMBRA 3: Oh!
ADAMUS: Not you. You're, “Oh no!” I'm not talking about you. I'm talking about for the others.
You would think also that I would get a popcorn necklace of … anyone, of anyone. (she tosses her popcorn necklace to Adamus) Thank you. Thank you. And you would think that an enterprising Shaumbra would find a way to have a permanent popcorn necklace, one that the birds and the squirrels weren't going to eat. (Someone brought popcorn necklaces to share at the meeting.)
EDITH: Do you want to eat it?
ADAMUS: No, I want a tuna fish sandwich. (Adamus chuckles) But not now, later. Later. Let's get on with … I'm getting hungrier as we talk, and not even pizza would satisfy my hunger now.
SHAUMBRA 3: True. Yeah.
ADAMUS: See what you did to me?
SHAUMBRA 3: Well, you know.
ADAMUS: Would you bring me a tuna fish sandwich to the next meeting?
SHAUMBRA 3: Yes, I will.
ADAMUS: Thank you.
SHAUMBRA 3: I promise you.
ADAMUS: Okay. Good. Good.
So where were we? Oh, fear. It is going to be all those things. It's going to be dismal. It's going to be the best year ever. It's going to be a year of liberation and sovereignty and it's going to be a despicable year. There's going to be crimes and it's all those things. And they're all occurring; they all have occurred. They're all potentials. They're all going to be lived out, to a degree. We're going to go beyond that. We're going to go into what you want. Good.
So why are you fearing? Why are you fearing anything?
SHAUMBRA 3: (sighing) That's a really good question.
ADAMUS: Does it do you any good?
SHAUMBRA 3: No. The only answer I'm finding to it is to just, as much as I can, whatever I'm afraid of, to just do it anyway. You know, just do it.
ADAMUS: That doesn't make sense.
SHAUMBRA 3: No? (they both chuckle)
ADAMUS: No. But it's better than running from it. But it's also, in a way, you're still fighting the fear.
SHAUMBRA 3: Well it's not pleasant. It's still not pleasant.
ADAMUS: It's still not pleasant. You're still fighting it.
SHAUMBRA 3: Right.
ADAMUS: And you're still in a way setting yourself up to be beaten by it.
SHAUMBRA 3: I guess so.
ADAMUS: We're going to bypass it. Okay? We're going to just bypass it.
SHAUMBRA 3: Great!
ADAMUS: You say great now, but when …
SHAUMBRA 3: No!
ADAMUS: … I tell how it can be done, you go, “Ohhhh, I don't know, Adamus. I don't know, mmmm.”
SHAUMBRA 3: Well, it can't hopefully be any worse than …
ADAMUS: Oh, it can be.
SHAUMBRA 3: It can?
ADAMUS: No, it can be worse. (laughter) Oh, dear god, you haven't even gotten into even the definition of worse yet.
SHAUMBRA 3: Okay.
ADAMUS: We haven't … oh, no, no, no. It can get a lot worse. Does that bring up the fear?
SHAUMBRA 3: Oddly, no.
ADAMUS: Oh, you want it to get worse.
SHAUMBRA 3: No. I just want to know what it is. It's just, you know, what is it? Let's find out what it is.
ADAMUS: You know, I'll give you the secret here and explain it more here later. She's telling you take a drink. (laughter) Yeah. Would you pour her a drink, please? She needs one.
SHAUMBRA 3: Please!
ADAMUS: We're just going to totally create a different reality.
SHAUMBRA 3: Okay.
ADAMUS: That's all, quite simply.
SHAUMBRA 3: I'm ready.
ADAMUS: Okay. Good. You say you're ready now, but we'll see. Don't forget this tuna, extra mayo. Yeah. And I do like the bread slightly warmed. You may have to figure out how you're going to do that, but …
LINDA: Canned tuna or fresh tuna?
ADAMUS: Canned or fresh, she asks. Crystal or paper? (Linda giggles) A little celery too.
Next. We'll do two more. What are you fighting in your life? Ah!
MICHELLE: I guess I'm …
LINDA: Oh-oh, eh-eh-eh-eh-eh. (gesturing to hold the microphone up)
MICHELLE: Oh. I'm … (she chuckles)
ADAMUS: You're fighting Linda right now. (Adamus chuckles)
MICHELLE: … parts of myself that frustrate me, such as irritation with certain individuals.
MICHELLE: Not anybody in here.
ADAMUS: Welllll, a little bit! Aghhh! Just a little bit. (some chuckles) So irritation with certain people …
ADAMUS: Yeah. Do you feel bad about being irritated with them?
ADAMUS: Why? I like being irritated with people.
MICHELLE: Because I was really irritated with someone over Christmas and it was not me. But it was me, because …
ADAMUS: It was you. (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: It really was. Why don't you just, tomorrow, just give them hell?
MICHELLE: Well, they're not in this state anymore, thank god. (laughter)
ADAMUS: What state and what city are they located in?
MICHELLE: Well, that's telling too much.
ADAMUS: There are telephones. There is Internet. You can give them hell from long distance.
MICHELLE: I'd rather not speak to this person.
ADAMUS: Ahhhh! I'd rather.
MICHELLE: Just a very strange …
ADAMUS: I'd rather really just get into it. When I have an enemy, ah, whoa, we'll go for it, right in the jugular. Yeah. Errghhhh!
MICHELLE: They haven't a clue. They haven't a clue.
ADAMUS: Well, I know, but give them a clue, because you know what? Otherwise, you're bottling it up in yourself.
MICHELLE: I'm not anymore.
ADAMUS: Ohhhhhh! I don't believe that. Mmmmm. No. But it was the first thing you mentioned when I said “What are you fighting?”
ADAMUS: Okay. What else? There's something else in there I'm fishing for here.
MICHELLE: Ummm. (laughter) The first …
ADAMUS: By the way, the Master understands the art of distraction. Linda, could you do that over here on your magic thing (the iPad). That's so important to remember. It gives you a little bit of humor, yourself, maybe nobody else. But as you're out there teaching or doing whatever you're going to do, as a Master you understand the art of distraction. It's magnificent because somebody could be confronting you, doing something challenging, you just distract them. Bring it from here over to here.
When you get in your own head, as you do – you get to that thinking, worrying, laying awake in bed at night – damn, just distract yourself! No, really. Just distract yourself. Play a game. Do something bizarre. Roll off the bed onto the floor! (some laughter) You'll shock yourself out of that meaningless mind crap that you had. Just take the blankets off and just roll – boom! – until you go off the side. And you'll laugh just like you are now, going, “I was so caught up in my own garbage.” A Master understands the art of distraction. I think we'll do a Shaumbra book when I get my other books finally out, “The Art of Distraction.”
Oh, did I distract you?
MICHELLE: Yes, you're the art of distraction.
ADAMUS: Yes. Intentional. The art of intentional distraction.
MICHELLE: Intentional distraction.
ADAMUS: What else are you fighting, my dear?
MICHELLE: I'm fighting myself.
ADAMUS: I know, I know. That's what I said. What are you fighting within yourself, but what in yourself?
MICHELLE: Just things that I don't like about myself.
ADAMUS: Okay. You don't have to mention anything, but you can if you want.
MICHELLE: I don't want to.
ADAMUS: Okay. I will then. (laughter) See the fear come up, wooo! (more laughter) It's none of my business.
MICHELLE: That's right.
ADAMUS: But a lot of fight going on there.
ADAMUS: Could I get personal? Okay I will. (more chuckles) It doesn't matter what the fight is about, but you try to pretend there is none, and that's what's really getting you. The fight is winning because you have to pretend there is none, and there is, my dear, and I'm going to show you by the end of this … oh, almost the new year somewhere. I'm going to show you by the end of this how much you've been fighting, how much it's been tying up your energy, how much it's been, oh, causing you ailments – physical, sleeping problems, talking problems. You have such a keen sense of humor and wisdom and you don't use it. You don't use it. You hold yourself back when you're trying to articulate something, and you have one of the most amazing natural senses of conversation and discussion.
MICHELLE: I do?
ADAMUS: Brilliant discussion. Not chatter, chatter, but brilliant. So hopefully – nah, not hopefully, we'll just make it a reality – by the end of this you're going to see how much energy you've been tying up in fighting things and you're pretending that you're not.
MICHELLE: Sounds good.
ADAMUS: Thank you. Thank you.
MICHELLE: Thank you.
ADAMUS: Oh no. It's going to be pathetic. It's going to be terrible for about three days …
MICHELLE: (chuckles) Thank you.
ADAMUS: … and then you'll get over it.
Okay, one more and we'll get to the point. You're probably wondering “What is the point of this Shoud other than distraction?” Yes. Massive distraction.
LINDA: Mm hmm. You.
GLORIA: I haven't … I don't have any question.
LINDA: Ohhh! That's not going to fly. No, no, no. You're not allowed to turn down the mike.
LINDA: That's what Adamus told us. You're not allowed to turn down the mike.
ADAMUS: Actually, you can turn down the mike, but then you have to clean the toilets at the end of the night (laughter), which normally wouldn't be a problem, but you're all going to be celebrating new years and drinking a lot and the toilets could get kind of messy, if you know what I mean. (audience is saying, “Oh, eww!”)
Yeah. Another distraction. See, you don't just throw something out. You create the whole illusion, the whole picture so everybody's imagining this really gross toilet and ohhhh!
ADAMUS: Yes. Yes. What have you been fighting within yourself?
GLORIA: I'm glad to be here. I don't have anything to fight about.
ADAMUS: So am I.
GLORIA: I don't know.
ADAMUS: Nothing? (she shakes her head no) Family?
ADAMUS: Family. Any family fights?
GLORIA: Maybe. Maybe.
ADAMUS: Ah! Now we start uncovering it. Of course, that was easy. Any of you could figure that out. Family fights, okay.
GLORIA: Well, not too many. They're kind of getting older now.
ADAMUS: Yeah, they're getting older and then they die and the fights aren't as much fun.
GLORIA: Exactly. (laughter)
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah.
GLORIA: They're dead. (she chuckles)
ADAMUS: They're dead. Yeah.
GLORIA: I don't know.
ADAMUS: So, what else?
GLORIA: What else? Hmm. I'm pretty contented peaceful person. I don't know …
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah. Okay. You don't ever, like, get mad at yourself or anything?
GLORIA: Yeah, I used to, but not anymore.
ADAMUS: Okay. What did you used to get mad at yourself about?
GLORIA: My family. (Adamus chuckles and some laughter)
ADAMUS: Okay. Good.
GLORIA: But nothing …
GLORIA: I was sad because my pet died, but otherwise …
ADAMUS: That's sad. That's not mad. There's a difference.
ADAMUS: And your pet is still around.
GLORIA: I know.
GLORIA: Thank you.
ADAMUS: They'll be the first thing that greets you when you go to the other side.
ADAMUS: Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's what I love about pets. They just wait.
ADAMUS: They just wait. “When's master going to die so I can … (laughter) “Ehh, maybe today. (some chuckles) Oh, maybe tomorrow. I'll wait anyway.” Don't forget to feed them. Feed them. Yeah. Energetic feeding, like send them little food, because they're just waiting for you.
ADAMUS: Yeah. Okay. Thank you.
GLORIA: Thank you.
ADAMUS: Thank you.
Okay, let's take a deep breath.
No More Fighting With Yourself
Going into this next year I'm going to tell you something that at first is going to sound wonderful and then it's going to sound bizarre. But please do feel it on all of the different levels that it's given.
And I'm going to tell you this and you're all going to shake your heads, nod your heads, “Oh, yeah, yeah, okay. We'll do it,” and then you're not going to do it. And then you're going to fight it. You're going to think I wasn't talking to you, but I am. You're going to think I was only talking about some of you, some of the things you do, but I'm talking about everything. And you're going to think that I maybe don't know what I'm talking about, but I do. (Adamus chuckles)
As we go into this year and henceforth, no more fighting with yourself. That includes the whole broad spectrum of things that you do to make things difficult on you. That includes fighting things like diet and weight, things like your physical appearance.
Now, you think you have to fight it, because you're a food-a-holic. You're going to eat a lot of chocolate and you're going to devour cake and potato chips. Don't fight it. No more regulating things like your food for the sake of your physique, for the sake of your body. A lot of you have put yourself on bizarre diets, and then justified it and said, “No, but the doctor told me I had low …” god knows what or high something else. You're fighting it. You're fighting yourself.
Let down your guard. “Ohhh! No.” You say, “I have to keep some of those guards up. I have to fight something, because I'm inherently a weak person. I'm a sinner. They told me that. So I have to have the fight. I've got to work against things. I'm inherently corrupt and I would just eat my way to death with tuna sandwiches if I didn't control myself.” No. The fight is done. The fight is done. Let it go.
Oh! I know. It's going to sound good and then it's going to sound bizarre. It's going to be sweet and then it's going to be bitter.
Smoking. Your arm. All the rest of that. Like, “I'm a smoker and this is bad.” No it's actually not. It doesn't really matter. Oh, I'm sorry, dear Linda and anybody else who's offended, but it really doesn't matter. A true Master – it doesn't matter.
A lot of you are smokers. You fight it. “I'm doing a bad thing. I'm going to quit someday.” No. You actually are probably not. You'll die first. (a few chuckles)
ADAMUS: Not so bad. Not so bad. But you are like, “Oh! There's something wrong with me,” and you have to go step outside and you have to be one of the strange, odd people, and then there's something you kind of like about that, being one of the ones who can go outside. And some of you who aren't smokers even want to join the outside people, because they're a little bit cooler.
ADAMUS: And that was Cauldre who said that. I didn't say that.
So you put up a fight within yourself and, “I have to control myself and I need to quit and it's bad.” Stop it. The Master does not engage in fighting with themselves anymore.
Some of you do things like working out, exercising. You do it because you think you have to. You're fighting something – age, weight, deterioration of the bones and the muscles. Stop it. I'm not saying stop exercising; stop that fight. You're only giving it energy. It is a part of you from the past, a fear or something incomplete in yourself, and you're only feeding that ghost, that monster.
A lot of you think that you have to limit your thoughts, that you can't really express your emotions because you're just going to have rage all over others. So you create this kind of a denial – “I have to be a nice person.” No, you don't. You don't. You realize 'nice person' is a hypnotic overlay that you've fallen into – “I have to be nice. I have to be nice to other people.”
Well, the funny thing is energetically you're not being nice to them, because you can't stand them. But you're trying to act nice, and you're like, “Namaste.” (said with an ugly face and then a sound of strangling; audience laughter) And but energetically you're sending out crap to them. “I can't stand that self-righteous … Namaste” (sarcastically). So you're trying act one thing. You have this fight going. Let it out! Let that rage out.
Now, this sounds very strange – “No. We have to be nice people. We're spiritual.” No, we're not spiritual anymore and you never were nice.
LINDA: Ohhh! (some chuckles)
ADAMUS: No, nice is hypnosis. You're not nice people. You're not. And I don't want you to be.
EDITH: Thank you.
ADAMUS: Because it's a hypnotic overlay put on to you by others. Nice is actually candy-ass. It's …
LINDA: It's what?
LINDA: What does that mean? I'm not sure that translates very well.
ADAMUS: That was Cauldre's word. I didn't use that. (some chuckles) Artificial. Nice is artificial. It's not real. There is no nice. There's genuine. There's compassionate. But nice is just this great big sales job. Okay? So no nice.
You fight things in your life. You fight if you're smart enough. So you try to be smarter and you're fighting your stupid, your stupidness. You're fighting that.
Well, basically we're all kind of stupid in a way. And stupid is good. Innocent is good. You don't think so much, and then you could come out with the real answers, which we'll get to in a minute.
Stupid – actually, I like stupid people.
EDITH: Like Forrest Gump.
EDITH: Like Forrest Gump.
ADAMUS: Like Forrest Gump. Thank you. Yes. 'Innocent' would be another word for it.
I'm going to ask you to stop the fight within yourself starting at the stroke of midnight wherever you happen to be. But stop that fight that you're not good enough, that you've done something wrong, that you need to work on yourself, that you need to make yourself better, that you need to improve yourself, that you have to have a plan. I don't want to see one of you, any one of you, have a New Year's … what do you call them?
ADAMUS: Resolution, because they never work. You're not resolving anything, and then you think you're ever a bigger schmuck than before the resolution. And you've got this whole battle going on.
Now, what I'm saying here doesn't apply to everybody out there. They would crumble to pieces if they took this advice. But for Shaumbra, I think you understand. No more fight.
Now, you're like, “Oh, this is going to be really good, because I'm really tired of fighting.” But the fact is you're not tired enough of fighting quite yet. So there's going to be a tendency to try to hide some fighting in your pockets or in the closet or wherever you hide things from me, which you don't. And there's going to be a tendency. It's like, “Well, I still have to work on my …” fill in the blank, “Because Adamus doesn't understanding my …” you know, your incredible weakness, your incredible addiction, your incredible perversions, your incredible everything. Yeah, I understand all of them. But I understand that by fighting them, you're living them.
By fighting them, you're living them.
When you fight these things, when you battle against yourself, when you have to set goals … Goals for a Master are like Kryptonite for Superman. “Ohh! Goals. Oh! Oh! Just …” Why goals? Goals are assuming that there's something wrong with you, that there's something you have to improve. You don't need goals. You need to live. That's all. You just need to live without the fight, without the struggle.
Life is not a struggle. It really isn't. If you take the essence of life, it's not a struggle. It never was. But there are a lot of things that have made it a struggle, and you've bought into it. You've been seduced into it and you kind of like it. Even though you say you don't like it, you do like it, because otherwise you wouldn't be doing it.
No more fight. Not fight in your health. If you have a health issue, stop fighting it. That sounds good at first, but then all of a sudden you're like, “Gasp! But that means I'm allowing it. I'm embracing it. Then it's going to take over.” You're going to be so surprised at how the fight itself made it real. How the focus … and I'm not saying, either, to avoid and pretend you don't have it. I'm saying to actually allow it.
It's counterintuitive to allow your addictions, to allow your illnesses, to allow your weaknesses, to allow all those things that you don't like about yourself. It's very, very counterintuitive. You've gotten so used to limiting yourself. Let's say you like pasta. “I can't eat pasta because it makes me fat.” Okay, well then it will. Then you have this fight going on and then it takes out the joy of life. Ohhh! No more fight with yourself.
You can fight with other people. It's actually kind of fun. No, it's really fun, because you realize that if you really let yourself wide open in a fight with somebody else; let's say you have a relative – brother, sister, somebody – that you just have spent years, you know, enduring and putting up with, and you give yourself permission – no more holding back, no more whatsoever – it feels kind of weird. You say, “Oh, I would kill them.” Eh, so what. (some chuckles) You know what? They're going to come back anyway. And what happens is once you give yourself that freedom, that permission, all of those warped perverse thoughts go away. You're not going to do it, but just giving yourself the freedom to say, “I'm just going to go and rip them a new one …”
LINDA: A new what?
ADAMUS: A new life. I'm going to rip them a new life. (laughter) What'd you think I meant? “I'm going to rip them a new life,” giving yourself that permission without fooling yourself saying, “Well, I give myself permission, but then I can't do it.” No, really. Give yourself that permission. Suddenly, you put yourself in a different consciousness. Suddenly, things become a lot more clear and suddenly you realize that actually you can – poof! – make them invisible if you want. But you don't want to.
Suddenly, you realize “I gave them a lot of power over me. I let them steal energy. It wasn't really their fault; it was my fault. I gave them all that power. Now that I realize that I'm not going to hold myself back. I don't have to play that game anymore.”
We're going to come back to this time and time again, and I'm going to call you on it during the year, but the fight is over. Whatever it is – health, relationships, self-loathing, self-doubt, food, any sort of addictions. There are no addictions; it's all mental. Any sort of thing that you're struggling against with yourself, including the “Why haven't I achieve more in my life?” I'm going to throw up if I ever see any of you thinking that, because you're looking at yourself through this little, microscopic view. You're looking at yourself, you say, “Well, other people have achieved more.” Other people haven't come to this planet at one of the most beautiful but challenging times to be an embodied Master. Is there anything grander? Just another degree is going to be better than that? A little bit more money? A bigger house? I don't think so. So when you get into that fight with yourself about what you've accomplished, let it go. No more fights.
A Special Room
Half of this sounds good, you're like, “Oh, good. No more fights.” Half of it is going to be very difficult, because you're conditioned to the battle, the struggle. You're conditioned to holding back. You're conditioned to having these demons of doubt in your life saying, “No more. Stop doing that. You're a bad person. Be nice.” So it's going to feel very, very uncomfortable. And that's where I'm going to open a very special room, a big room, fancy room, with tuna fish sandwiches and chocolate chip cookies in the Crimson Circle website. It's going to be …
SART: Will it have padded walls?
ADAMUS: Padded walls. (a few chuckles) No, I think the walls will be made of chocolate pudding on one side and … padded walls? What are you … ice cream on the other side and … (someone says, “Don't forget jalapeños”) Jalapeños. A wall of jalapeños. I love that. (laughter) Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! Good. The jalapeño wall. We'll have many walls in this room. (more chuckles)
So I'm going to ask dear Michelle to open this little place on the website where you can go, and it'll probably be, I don't know, a blank screen or a pretty picture or something. But this will be the place where you come when you are a little in overwhelm at giving up the fight, and you get confused. You get confused about the fight that you're having within yourself – what to do, how to let it go, what the consequences are – you just come there. I'll be there – how do you say it – twenty-four …
ADAMUS: … seven. I'll be there all the time. You'll know I'm there because you're going to smell tuna sandwich. (some chuckles)
ADAMUS: I love tuna sandwich! I would come back for another incarnation just to have a good tuna sandwich with chips. With chips. Yes. Next month.
So we'll open this up on the website, just a little room that you click on. We'll get the information out to you. You come here if you're confused about the fight or if you think you still need to fight and we'll talk. We'll talk. You and I will fight. You notice I already have a bandage on my hand getting ready for it.
So I'm going to put it out there again, we'll come back to it next month, no more fight within yourself. And you're going to try to apply it to the outside world and say, “Oh, I shouldn't be fighting.” Eh. Fight the outside world; stop it within yourself. Stop all of these limitations and arguments and holding back and self-prescriptions and all the other weird things that you do. Let yourself free. (Edith raises her hand.)
You're going to ask me if you can have an exception?
ADAMUS: Would you hand her the microphone.
LINDA: My pleasure
ADAMUS: Yeah. Yes.
EDITH: Why the heck can't we just release all the bull?
ADAMUS: Don't ask me. (Adamus laughs) Because you're – I'll give you a straight answer – because you're human. Because of a lot of conditioning and a lot of fear and a lot of things that are not true, but you believe them to be.
So what happens is you hear things. You heard them back with Tobias. I do believe Cauldre recently wrote an article about the Silent Prayer.
EDITH: Very nice.
ADAMUS: And you heard it back then, but you still didn't get it. You read it and said, “Oh, that sounds so good,” but you didn't embody it.
You don't let go. You don't release because you're human and you don't think you can. You don't think that you're empowered to do so. You don't think that it's possible, and you base it on past experiences when you tried something and it didn't work. Even if it didn't work one time out of a hundred, that's where you put your consciousness – the one time it didn't work.
So it's conditioning, my dear. It's hypnosis. It's conditioning. It's belief, and partly because you're a coward.
EDITH: Takes one to know one. (Adamus chuckles)
ADAMUS: All of you. No, it's bit of cowardice.
EDITH: We can do all that. We do that all the time.
EDITH: No! Release, release, release, release and allow.
ADAMUS: (sighing) We have still a ways to go, don't we. (a few giggles)
Part of it is cowardice, and what I mean by that is that you take little baby steps into enlightenment, and baby steps will never get you there. It's a true release, a true leap. You think you have to learn this and then this and then this. We have to keep going along with these Shouds. No. No.
So I call it cowardice, being chicken, to really … You're waiting – not you, but everybody here – is waiting for somebody else to do it. We ought to come out with chicken tee-shirts, holding back for no good reason. That's why I annoy all of you. That's why I distract you. That's why we go through some of the things we do to say when are you going to be ready?
With that, it's a perfect segue into my closing statement and a bit of a merabh.
EDITH: Oh, I think we're ready and we do …
ADAMUS: Yes. It's almost time to party.
So, dear Shaumbra, we talked about giving up the fight, and you're going to be thinking about that, feeling into it, considering “What did he mean?” Then there's going to be a lot of chatter on your social media about what I really meant. And there are going to be people speculating, and they're going to be quoting me on things I didn't say. It's not about anything but within yourself. It's your own way of controlling yourself, limiting yourself, battling with yourself, holding back on yourself, regulating and restricting yourself, because there's an underlying feeling that you've done something wrong or you're weak or you need to improve. Underlying assumption that there's something not right.
To an extent, that's partly right. But that's just one layer. That's just one reality. There is that other reality where you can put your consciousness that it's already all there. You already know.
You already know.
And when you come to our new place on the website, to this beautiful room – we'll give it a nice name. When you come to this room, you come there realizing, knowing that you already know. When you have questions, when you have fears, when you wonder what's going to come next, come there to feel into that you already know.
You do this by being real quiet, and maybe we'll have some nice music playing, maybe some Yoham music playing in this room. You come there and you just take a deep breath, and you get relaxed.
And you just come to realize that you already know the answer to everything that you're wondering about. I'm not going to give you the answer, but I'll encourage you to realize the answer that you already have.
You come there to this room that we're going to create, and by the way, the password is “I Exist. I Am that I Am. I Know that I Know.” That's the password. That'll get you in. Literally. I want you to type that out. “I Exist.” Period. “I Am that I Am.” Period. “I Know that I Know.” Period. It has to be done in upper- and lowercase. All uppercase will not work. (laughter)
I Exist. Let's just rehearse it right now. I Exist.
AUDIENCE: I Exist.
ADAMUS: No, quietly. (Adamus chuckles) What do you think this is? Sunday school?! “Repeat after me. Jesus died for my sins.” (some chuckles)
ADAMUS: (chuckling) Do you understand how that brainwashing works? “Yes, I'll repeat teacher. Jesus died for my sins.” Well, then you get feeling really bad about yourself, really bad. And then you go through the rest of your life like, “He died for my sins.” Jesus doesn't care about your sins.
Let's take a deep breath. Do not repeat after me. (Adamus chuckles) Feel it for yourself. The other Ascended Masters are laughing.
Oh, that is the realization of mastery. I Exist.
I Am that I Am.
What does that mean? That sounds nice when people say it. “I Am that I Am. Namaste.” I Am that I Am. Everything I've ever done, everything I ever will do, every potential that I ever created in the Wall of Fire, I Am that I Am.
I am not just what I remember, what I think I am. But I am all that I Am, all the layers and levels, things experienced and not experienced, realized and unrealized. I am all of those.
I am anything that I choose to be. That's what that really means. I Am that I Am. I'm anything I choose to be.
And then I Know that I Know.
You see, I've often said and often scolded when somebody stands up and says, “Well, I don't know.” No, you do know. You just don't know that you know. You do know every answer. You do know every twist and turn of the past, as well as the future. You know the future. That's the amazing thing. It kind of takes the impact out of the future. Kind of negates the whole word “future.” You start realizing it's just all right now.
So there is that knock, knock, knock on the door of our new room on the website.
“What's the password?”
“I Exist. I Am that I Am. I Know that I Know.”
“Okay, you can come in.”
And then you just sit. You just sit quietly. You feel into the I Exist. You feel into the I Am. Anything I choose to be, I Am. And then you really allow the I Know that I Know. Don't come in here, sit down and say, “Well, I don't know.” Don't ask me. Don't ask Adamus. You say, “I know that I know,” and then shut up and let it come to you.
Then just let it come to you, “I Know that I Know.”
Funny thing happens is you start to realize, “Yeah, actually I do know. I don't know how I know, but I know that I know.” Then you start to realize that there really wasn't much to know anyway. In other words, you really weren't walking around like lost, you weren't walking around clueless like you thought you were. You really did know.
You kind of laugh. You remember the sessions we had here where I really had to chastise somebody when they said, “I don't know.” You laugh and go, “Now I understand why Adamus did that. They did know.”
It's real simple. “I Exist. I Am that I Am. I Know that I Know.”
And while you're sitting in this beautiful, beautiful new room, kind of an addition on to the website; while you're sitting in here, you realize “Why was I fighting all this stuff about myself? What was that fight about? What was that battle about?” Then you have a good laugh and say, “I must have enjoyed something about it. But boy am I glad that we're putting a stop to it.” You realize there is nothing to fight. Not in your body, not in your thoughts, not in your choices. When there's nothing to fight, there's also nothing to fear.
When there's nothing to fight, there's nothing to fear.
And then you get this huge love wash that comes over you from You to yourself, this tingling that goes all through your body. Then you realize this sense of freedom. You realize that there are no goals. It's only about the joy of life. You realize it's not trying to make yourself better in any way. You realize the perfection that's already there.
Then you're probably going to have a few tears. We're going to need some tissue boxes in this room. You're going to have a few tears, letting go, asking yourself why. “Why, oh why, did I make it so hard? Why didn't Adamus tell me sooner?”
You're going to have some more tears and you'll really then release, Edith. You'll really let go. Then you'll realize that you were kind of being a coward before. Always getting in these fights with yourself, never letting yourself know that you knew.
You're going to realize that you almost made it difficult on yourself. Almost. Always putting up that fight in yourself. You're going to realize that the fight's done now. Only a coward fights. Yeah.
You're going to take a good deep breath. Oh, I can't wait to go in this room with you. You're going to take a good deep breath after you've had a lot of tears, and you're going to reach your hand over to that wall, take a big scoop of chocolate pudding and not feel bad about it and not worry that the wall is going to fall down or not worry that it's going to get germs. Not worried about the color or anything. Shut up! Enjoy the chocolate pudding and a tuna fish sandwich. They really go good together. It's got to be one of my favorites.
Then you're going to take a deep breath and say, “Damn we made it. We made it to the end of 2014.” That's the miracle. That is the miracle. (audience applause)
If I had told you at the beginning of this lifetime that you were going to make it to end of 2014, you probably wouldn't have believed it. You probably wouldn't have believed it. It's a miracle that you endured. It's a miracle you're still alive, really, and semi-functioning. (some laughter, Adamus chuckles) And a miracle that we're together here and we can laugh and smile and joke and distract, and don't forget what I said. The Master understands the art of deliberate deception … distraction. (lots of laughter) Distraction. I distracted you for a moment.
So let's take a good deep breath.
You made it to the end of 2014. 2015 – what's it all about? It's about realization. Period. I'm not going to put up with any makyo, any excuses. I'm not going to put up with any fights within yourself. Nope. I'm going to call them out on the carpet. I'm not going to put up with any excuses, any “I don't knows,” any, “Oh, you don't understand, Adamus. I had a really hard life.” You want a hard life? One hundred thousand years in a crystal, that's a hard life.
So let's take a good deep breath, as we transition, really, into a new era for you, for Crimson Circle, for the world. Oh, it's going to be crazy year. You thought this year was tough, wait till next year. But you know what? It's not yours.
And you know what? In spite of all the crazy stuff going on, all the wars and the violence and lost airplanes and everything else, in spite of all that, you're going to be able to step back, take a deep breath and say …
ADAMUS AND AUDIENCE: All is well in all of creation.
ADAMUS: Happy New Year. God bless each and every one of you. Thank you. Thank you. (audience applause)
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